Yeah, this is the problem I always had with Eva. You cannot expect rationality and professional forsight from kids, much less emotional unstable ones like Shinji. To give him shit for going to the ends of the world, a world that never gave a single shit about him either, to safe the person he cared about and take a massive dump on him for it is incredibly spiteful.
I can see how people liked the more positive approach the previous Rebuilds indicated and dislike this development now. At the same time, Eva wouldn't be Eva without a healthy dose of cynicism.
As for disliking the film, apart from the obvious shortcomings, I can't say I do but it will take some time and multiple viewings to be at peace with it.