Realistic Ways To Make Eva More Disturbing

[robersora]

The sort of "disturbing" I have in mind isn't some kind of passing shock value. Like, you see something weird, idly say, "Wow, that's disturbing", and promptly forget about it. This is "disturbing" in truer form -- something uncanny, unsettling, upsetting. Maybe it's mostly bothering you on an unconscious level, but there's something going on that won't get out of your head, and that nerved feeling keeps stirring in your chest.

Well then we should hire those guys for Evangelion, don't you think?
Aside from that, I agree what you said.[/url]

[Hyper Shinchan]

what else do they think about? What would happen if you let them out? Yeah, it IS creepy.

Ask to Yamashita, he has the answer.

[symbv]

That one can have a mind but not a soul is one of those interesting NGE concepts. The Rei clones have no real soul, but they think enough to do the things you described... what else do they think about? What would happen if you let them out? Yeah, it IS creepy.

Kind of reminds me of some debates I heard about whether there is a soul in monkeys and dogs -- they show some level of consciousness and can show response to calls directed at them. And the laughs of the Rei clones may be just like their way of wailing and barking that monkeys or dogs give. At least in NGE we are told that the Rei clones do not have souls, it is much more tricky to tell in real life.....

[Reichu]

NGE's own stance on the issue is that all lifeforms have souls by default -- even your intestinal flora. So comparing the clones to dogs and basal primates probably doesn't work.

IMO, there is a possibility that they would be inert lumps of meat if they weren't attached (via LCL transmission line) to the Rei Overbrain. The consciousness that they demonstrate reflects the limitations of soul-digitizing technology, in other words.

I can either split this or we can get back on topic. Ya'll's choice.

[Reichu]

For the sake of getting the thread back to disturbing things, I'll just say that a thread search for words like "microbes" and "microorganisms" will turn up devoted threads on the issue should anyone want to pursue it further.

[Kendrix]

...Simple yet effective thing I once saw in a fanfic: Have Shinji do it with Rei. Then, have someone tell him her "recipe". Have him have flashbacks to his early childhood, mixed with Rei-related stuff, and crown it with a juxtaposition of Yui breatfeeding Shinji and Shinji pleasuring Rei via her Nipple.

...It was obvious that that fanfic was gonna get squicky like that from the very title, but the scene really got me, (And I say that as a convinced R/S fan) and I'm not easily impressed by stuff that is separated from me by a screen.
Needless to say, Fanfic!Shinji had an unexpected reunion with parts of his breakfast.

...Otherwise, look no further than anything written by Adam Kadmom, he has a talent for keeping everything surpringly IC and logically sound while pulling off storylines otherwise only found in trollfics or the worst of PWP while playing them completely serious.

Or find a way to include deformed fetuses, because nothing's squickier than THAT. You know, sorted-out Rei-clones, failed attempts at creating EVAs... Just imagine what the things in the EVA graveyard or what Shinji and Misato drive past in EoE looked like when there was still meat on its bones.
In fact, do something with the Rei clones. Have them try to make Asuka (The person whoI think would be most horrified by that) "join them"...

Or look for stuff like AKIRA or Elfen Lied for Inspiration. Or heck, rejected scripts for EoE or Rebuild. Some pretty "nice" stuff in there. Like "Last B" or the defacement scene. No, no vandalism, literal de-face-ing.

...But then again, it's not like EVA has any serious lack of biological horror... I think it's pretty much fine as it is.

[Bagheera]

...Otherwise, look no further than anything written by Adam Kadmom, he has a talent for keeping everything surpringly IC and logically sound while pulling off storylines otherwise only found in trollfics or the worst of PWP while playing them completely serious.

His work is actually a fine example of the shock value Reichu was dismissing earlier (and rightly so). His characters aren't IC, the plots aren't logically sound, and the notion that he "pulls off" his storylines is dubious at best.

Trollfic, OTOH, is an apt description.

Or look for stuff like AKIRA or Elfen Lied for Inspiration.

Elfen Lied manga is surprisingly emotional at the end. It's actually a very good example.

A Shinji/Rei relationship played straight could work as well. You don't usually see that since fans look at the two with shipping glasses, but if they can get away from that it makes for powerful stuff.

[Reichu]

A Shinji/Rei relationship played straight could work as well. You don't usually see that since fans look at the two with shipping glasses, but if they can get away from that it makes for powerful stuff.

As much as I don't care for that particular pairing, I will +1 Bagheera here. I've played around with wacky incestuous stuff in my writings, and "powerful" feels quite appropriate... Disturbing, but powerful.

[Kendrix]

His work is actually a fine example of the shock value Reichu was dismissing earlier (and rightly so). His characters aren't IC, the plots aren't logically sound, and the notion that he "pulls off" his storylines is dubious at best.
.

YMMV there. There's a lot of people who love them and agree with me. The fact that it stays mostly IC (in my opinion) is the most shocking thing about it because... *gulp* it might have actually happened if a few little factors were different, that's how fragile the setting and the characters are...

Dunno, it might be a love-it-or-hate-it thing

[Hyper Shinchan]

meh, even fellow R/S shippers like Kendrix think that it could be disturbing, maybe I don't need shipping glasses any more because I've altered my vision with laser eye surgery... Anyway I've not read this fanfic that she's mentioned so I really don't know, I doubt that I'd find it disturbing though.

[Na7e]

The fact that it stays mostly IC (in my opinion) is the most shocking thing about it because... *gulp* it might have actually happened if a few little factors were different, that's how fragile the setting and the characters

Dunno, it might be a love-it-or-hate-it thing

So Gendo raping Shinji is in character? Or the fact in Subtrahend Hikari is madly in love with Shinji to an extremly creepy extent. Kills Asuka. Then kills Shinji. How is that in character? And, no it's a majority of hate from what I seen.

[Bagheera]

YMMV there. There's a lot of people who love them and agree with me. The fact that it stays mostly IC (in my opinion) is the most shocking thing about it because... *gulp* it might have actually happened if a few little factors were different, that's how fragile the setting and the characters are...

If by "a few little factors" you mean "numerous fundamental aspects of the setting", sure. In every story of his I've read I've run into continuity errors that, if corrected, would make the stories in question fizzle. The only exception I've encountered to date is Witness, and that was one of his more mainstream fics.

[Kendrix]

It's this one. You can tell that it's going to end badly by looking at the title, but it's just done so well you forget it... It goes great legths to line out just why the two are so perfect for each other and how the comon misconceptions about the pairing just don't apply... and then comes the big revelation, and everything goes STRAIGHT TO HELL. Magnificiently.

I must say that some parts involving Gendo feel a little contrived (then again, the premise sort of demanded it), but otherwise, it's an awesome read, (the style is great, it has little details like the Tv programms in the background hinting at the story just like in the series) no matter wether you support R/S or not. (If you don't, look forward to the tragic conclusion, if you do, well, its simply an agle that is there and is interesting to see explored for a change...)

the worst are, besides the afore mentioned breast juxtaposion, the little hope spots towards the end, where Shinji seems to be getting over the initial shock, not knowing that, well... yeah... the basic idea behind it was to do an evangelion version of the basic oedipus story, and you know how that ended.... Still, its definitely an idea that needed to be done.

[Bagheera]

SerialRavist is a solid writer. It's a pity about the ending, though; it was really nothing to do with R/S and more just a way to end things on a tragic note. I've always thought it was a pity he didn't take things all the way through EoE to show what he could do with Kaworu and Instrumentality proper. But oh well.

[Kendrix]

SerialRavist is a solid writer. It's a pity about the ending, though; it was really nothing to do with R/S and more just a way to end things on a tragic note. I've always thought it was a pity he didn't take things all the way through EoE to show what he could do with Kaworu and Instrumentality proper. But oh well.

I guess he saw no reason in continuing the story after its subjects were dead, but he still wanted to give it and Asuka's side-arc some closure... Don't think any less depressing ending would have fit, it wouldn't have been what the story was about...

[Xana]

Give the Teletubbies a cameo in the series.

...Simple yet effective thing I once saw in a fanfic: Have Shinji do it with Rei. Then, have someone tell him her "recipe". Have him have flashbacks to his early childhood, mixed with Rei-related stuff, and crown it with a juxtaposition of Yui breatfeeding Shinji and Shinji pleasuring Rei via her Nipple.

...It was obvious that that fanfic was gonna get squicky like that from the very title, but the scene really got me, (And I say that as a convinced R/S fan) and I'm not easily impressed by stuff that is separated from me by a screen.
Needless to say, Fanfic!Shinji had an unexpected reunion with parts of his breakfast.

I've read that, it started out fine and then became awesome, but, after the sex scenes were introduced, and especially that scene you mentioned there, it became incredibly unsettling to me; Of course I was expecting it seeing as the fic is rated "M" but still, I was in shock and couldn't sleep at all that night.
This is not to say that I didn't like it, I thought it was really well written, much better than most R/S fanfics out there; it just left me with some temporary mental scars. So yeah, the idea could work.
I was kind of hoping that the story would end with Asuka finding them when they were "busy" together and went insane and killed them both or something, but the actual ending was much more fitting.

[Ironfoot]

Disturbing to some, not unexpected to others:

-Misato having sex with minors (Shinji), where the sequences are almost fully shown.
-An angel that slowly bleeds an Evangelion to death, including the pilot involved whose internal organs slowly implode, figuratively and visually.
-Showing how a Rei clone is made
-A scene where Rei's body parts begin to fall off as she has sex with Gendo (hilarious).
-Asuka's attempted suicide is expanded upon, where she visually cuts her wrists and begins a depressing dialogue about her life.
-In EoE, upon the death of Asuka a shot is seen of her maimed corpse being devoured by a harpy.
-Instead of the masturbatory scene, Shinji rapes a comatose Asuka instead.
-While in prison after the Bardiel incident, Shinji is raped by a SEELE member.

I guess that's enough rape for one post.

[Reichu]

Ironfoot: A lot of that sounds like the sort of thing one would (and does) find in bad ero doujins.

Also, Asuka would be an insignificant source of meat to a traditionally-sized cannibal. She wouldn't even show up on the ravenous harpies' radars.

[Ironfoot]

Ironfoot: A lot of that sounds like the sort of thing one would (and does) find in bad ero doujins.

Also, Asuka would be an insignificant source of meat to a traditionally-sized cannibal. She wouldn't even show up on the ravenous harpies' radars.

You can blame my job for that, not that I don't mind.

And you're right about Asuka, it's better to leave her in the Entry Plug. When Shinji emerges from the NERV complex and looks at the gruesome images of Unit-02 torn apart, the last thing he'll see is Unit-02's entry plug being crushed in the fist of a harpy (ala Toji, even though Asuka is already dead), making his scream much more dramatic. It'll also silence those who think she somehow survived the lancelot onslaught.

[Bagheera]

And you're right about Asuka, it's better to leave her in the Entry Plug. When Shinji emerges from the NERV complex and looks at the gruesome images of Unit-02 torn apart, the last thing he'll see is Unit-02's entry plug being crushed in the fist of a harpy (ala Toji, even though Asuka is already dead), making his scream much more dramatic. It'll also silence those who think she somehow survived the lancelot onslaught.

People actually try to claim that? Why? It's not like it'd change anything that happened next.