Last Movie You Watched

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Postby Chuckman » Thu Jun 14, 2018 7:43 pm

I watched it.

Go read the book, if you haven't yet. The movie doesn't spoil anything.
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Postby VUX » Sat Jun 16, 2018 1:52 pm

I watched the Gulimo del Torro film The Shape of the Water about two nights ago, and I gotta say that it was pretty good. The CGI was impressive, especially when the Amphibian Man was glowing. I also felt that the main protagonist was unique in that she was incapable of speech, but you could always understand what the actress was trying to convey. The film is indeed weird, but I would say a good, somewhat refreshing weird.
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Postby Gus Hanson » Sat Jun 16, 2018 9:43 pm

I had to settle for Spanish audio when watching Incredibles 2 yesterday in theaters because apparently the tickets for the English one sold out like wildfire. :um: But it didn't deter me from enjoying what was simply a divine sequel! This time Elastigirl gets the front row seat as MC as the film is going for that women rock just as much as men approach that films like Star Wars have been employing recently. Unlike SW, this one manages to get just about everything right like not sidelining the other characters who matter just as much. In fact, the Incredible kids get much more screen time in particular the baby with his ever growing set of super powers.
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Postby movieartman » Mon Jun 18, 2018 8:13 pm

Bunch of reviews/random thoughts I typed up but haven't posted for films watched since October.

Rituals / The Creeper (1977)
- Canadian Wilderness survival horror with slasher elements. Similar to Deliverance but very much strong enough to stand on its own.
- Gorgeous locations & shots from atop mountains.
- Cast of characters are fleshed out fairly well & the acting is solid all around.
- Hal Holbrook in particular gives a restrained but emotionally effective & searing profornance.
- Pretty damn bleak.
- Film quality in all versions I have come across shift drastically from scene to scene. Especially the finale sadly being very dim compared to the rest of the film. Altho more followable then I had been lead to believe by some other reviews.

The Bunker (2001)
- Really fond of this one.
- Germans stuck in a Bunker with paranoia & possibly ghost wearing them down.
- Similar to the more well known Deathwatch (2002) but in my opinion better, certainly the more subtle of the 2.
- One of the few films out there which handles the "is it ghost or not" mystery very well and convincingly never really answers it.
- Great cast who somehow manage to make WW2 Germans seem sympathetic. With the exception of the intentional dickbag of the group.

Visitors (2003)
- Woman sailing around the world in competition begins faltering to cabin fever & ghost.
- Long been a fan of Radha Mitchell and this is her show all the way.
- Film is decent all the way through but it does get fairly unsubtle at points & could have used more mystery & mood.

Scarecrows (1988)
- I would avoid trailers as they tend to be spoilery.
- Among my favorite horror films. Not top favs but still in there for sure.
- Great focus on unnerving tension & mood.
- Isolated farm setting is well used.
- Damn good score.
- Characters despite mostly being criminals are fleshed out well enough with each having their own ticks & bonds with each other. I particularly like Corbin who just seems like the brutal muscle of the group but ends up showing himself to have a lot of honor & compassion.
- Ending is a bit mean spirited but it works.

Olympus Has Fallen (2013)
- Really damn good & underrated action film in the vein of Die Hard.
- 5 times better then the same years White House Down & a hundred times better then the 5th Die Hard.
- Great cast all around.
- Butler is a great brutal lead.
- Rick Yune (die another day) is a great if underused villain here. Looks & sounds elegant & high class. Even while beating a woman near to death or fighting hand to hand with the lead he rocks his suit. He is smug in a non arrogant matter of factly manner.
- Film has a brutality & ferocity to it that adds to its authenticy.
- Low point of the film is the CGI for landmarks in day & helicopters at night. Really poor. Early CGI for aircraft is decent.
- The sequel is not as good but still decent & worth seeing if you liked this cast of characters.

Justice League - The New Frontier (2008)
- Love this, arguably the best DC animated film ever, only Mask of the Phantasm gives it challenge.
- Miguel Ferrer voicing Martian Manhunter is perfect.
- Tone is extremely comfy but isn't afraid to go dark (the narrator sort of commits suicide in the opening)

Justice League - Crisis on 2 Earths (2010)
- Main league members voices are kinda meh to poor (superman especially is lacking) but James Woods & Gina Tores do very well as Owlman & Superwoman
- Great fight scenes.

Predator (1987)
Predator 2 (1990)
- Like all 3 Predator films pretty much equally.
- Early scenes with Bill Paxton & Maria Conchita Alonso are kinda cringy but they improve after tragedy strikes the team.

The Haunted Sea (1997)
- Very poor overall but Krista Allen does supply some fantastic nude scenes & James Brolin is cool for what tiny moments he is on screen.
- The monster conceptually is cool (look at the statue of it) but execution wise the suit sucks bad.

It the terror from beyond space (1958)
- Damn good 50s monster film with a solid cast.
- Went on to heavily inspire Alien.
- Only flaw is it comes off in bad taste the main female character cozying up to the lead while her boyfriend is dying.

Hellbound (1994)
- Some decent parts but the stuff with Chuck Norris's partner is insufferable at times.

The Mutilator / Fall Break (1985)
Watched it in clear HD for the 1st time, this is probably my 3rd viewing, 1st viewing was near unintelligible, 2nd time was decent quality.

Cast is very bland, the semi joker character is decently likable, the puritan lead female is notably not.
Good skinny dipping scene, great kills, good setting on the beach house, although the shots when they drive up & park make it seem not nearly as isolated as they want us to feel it is as there are a bunch of other condos around. Music is adequate. Acting is also, I think the lead male is the weakest but he does get at least 1 or 2 good moments (his voice when he realizes who the killer is)

Killer is kinda interesting, he has no mask or outfit, he comes off as the slasher personification of the drunken asshole dad you try & avoid, he gets some solid badass moments. One when the lead male knocks him down with a pole hit to the head, he gets right back up and punches the fucking shit out of him into the wall.
His battle axe is a damn solid primary weapon.
They take his resilience to injury to preposterous but effectively disturbing extremes during the damn good finale.
SPOILER: Show
Image


Film has a bit of a tonal disparity as there is 1 moment (after the killing has already started) with footage of a character sped up for comedic purpose in a rush to do something after his girlfriend promises him sex upon his return which is fun but feels like it should be in a parody, but then it has 1 of the most mean spirited slasher kills you will ever see.

Overall it's a decently solid slasher, not great, but much worse out there.

Madman (1982)
Another decent.slasher. Killer is very meh, however the film is more stylish then the typical Friday 13th rip off. Very good use of lighting & shadow.
Gaylan Ross from the original Dawn of the Dead is a good final girl, sexy despite a odd looking face.
Score is very unremarkable.
Kills are good, 1 really brutal hanging is kinda hard to watch with the victim struggling & skin turning purple.

Humongous (1982)
- 2nd time viewing ever...
- Can't put my finger on exactly what but something or some combination of things make the film really endearing.
- Island setting is cool, scenes on the boat traversing the fog shrouded waters is eerie and fun.
- Female cast is all likable, final girl is solid, geek girl is adorable, the redhead slut is fun and gets a good number of sexy moments.
- Final girl is interesting, surprisingly for such a early slasher she is not a classy virgin, not only is she shown in bed with her boyfriend, it's implied she lets him finger her ass while she pilots the boat in broad daylight.
- Male cast is blah, lead male is flat, his brother is a unlikable near psycho dickbag.
- Killer isn't seen enough to say how menacing he is make up wise, his growls and raging roars are pretty effectively menacing and we get a few badass shots of him in silhouette, however he is really unremarkable overall.
- Except the very last of the teen group to be killed, kills are all meh.
- Electronic score is good.
- Final battle is solid.

Shakedown (1988)
Fairly damn underrated buddy cop film IMO.
Peter Weller & Sam Elliot have fantastic chemistry together, Weller despite looking kinda geeky in premotional photos is charismatic as hell & his enthusiasm is palpable. A sequel with them returning would have been nice. Patricia Charbonneau is very sexy here.
Flaws, villains are non entities, finale is absolutely absurd, I've seen people say all the action in the film is outlandish, I don't think so, just the ending. And it isn't even the lack of realism it's the preposterous negligence of it. Spoilers:
SPOILER: Show
Elliot has climbed on the wheel of a private jet and is then shooting at the engine to bring it down while in flight but the imagery they splice in behind Elliot has the plane above NYC and so it looks like he is gonna crash it right into the World Trade Center or Empire State Buildings, then the plane is landing because of the engine failure, he could just go arrest the bad guys on board, instead he throws a grenade inside killing the villains and their innocent pilots


Detonator / Death Train (1993)
- Decent TV movie-ish action film.
- Despite the apparently lower budget showing through periodically, film has some well done moody noir-ish shots.
- Christopher Lee is wasted.
- Brosnan is a good lead but isn't nearly as smooth as he would be 2 years later in Goldeneye also his character isn't nearly as cool under pressure & comes off prone to faint panic.
- Alexandra Paul does a surprisingly good job. They spend a little too much time with Brosnan being sexist towards her but they thankfully don't beat you over the head with her proving him wrong, they just show her being naturally competent.

Solomon Kane (2009)
- Among my favorite fantasy films.
- Appreciate them being willing to go into really bleak territory.
- James Purefoy looks like he would just be a poor man's Hugh Jackman but he gives a seriously damn good searingly emotional proformance.
- The cast of the family Kane befriends all do good jobs. RIP Pete Postlethwaite.
- Some great sets & moody filming locations.
- Final battle devolves into giant CGI monster territory but thankfully that portion doesn't drag on too long & the CGI while not great is better then you might expect.

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Postby Chuckman » Thu Jun 21, 2018 10:36 pm

Tonight I watched Jurassic Park 5: Jurassic World 2: The Lost World Part Deux: Billy and the Clonosaurus.

My review of this movie is that Tyrannosaurs have a unique adaptation, which allows a ten ton animal that smells like a dead goat on a shit wagon to sneak up on people who are looking right at it, as long as it’s not on camera.

The ending was so profoundly stupid that I don’t know what on God’s green earth they intended with it.

I have never seen such a collection of horror movie stupid characters together under one banner. The entire plot relies on a couple of people doing things that no human being in their right mind would ever even think about doing, and the ending pulls the same stunt to set up Jurassic Park World 6.

It still wasn’t as bad as The Hobbit: An Unexepectedly Shitty Movie, but it’s so poorly written and paced that even though I missed an important plot point because I had to pee, it was repeated later anyway. Twice.

At least I had Skittles.
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Postby Kazuki_Fuse » Fri Jun 22, 2018 12:22 am

View Original PostChuckman wrote:Tonight I watched Jurassic Park 5: Jurassic World 2

Not even Chef Goldblum saved it?
Avatar: "Here is a magical girl who would not take it anymore"
"Surprise is an insubstantial blade, a sword worthless in war. It breaks when troops rally, it snaps when commanders hold the line, but fear never fades. So let the enemy know we come, let their fears defeat them as everything falls dark, as the worlds sun sets, as the city is wreathed in its final night. Let ten thousand howls promise ten thousand claws. The Night Lords are coming, and no soul that stands against us shall see another dawn"
-excerpt from The Tenebrous Path

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Postby Chuckman » Fri Jun 22, 2018 12:45 am

I should probably tag this. The following spoiler pertains to Jeff Goldblum, peace be upon him, only.

SPOILER: Show
Not only is his entire appearance in the movie in what you see in the trailers, but it’s used as a bizarre framing device. He starts his monologue at the beginning, then reappears at the end to deliver the “welcome to Jurassic World” stinger. The way it’s structured suggests that the entire movie takes place over the course of about five minutes while he’s speaking, and what he says makes no sense in context because the hearing where he’s addressing Congress takes place before the entire movie, so he basically starts monloging to some very confused people about some things that haven’t happened yet.

Oh, and even though it’s in the trailer, he does not repeat the “life life can’t be contained” soliloquy.

He has no role in the movie and might as well be credited as “and Jeff Goldblum as himself.


He is beautiful to look upon though.

The biggest problem with this movie is that it moves at a really haphazard, breakneck pace. Probably because they think if they move fast enough the audience won’t realize it’s an almost beat for beat remake of The Lost World with the role of Vince Vaughn played by a twelve year old girl.

The pacing is really really bad. There’s no time to connect with any of the characters or get invested in the story, and the plotting is superficial and lazy. Plus Owen and Claire are the worst leads ever, and Chris Pratt has more chemistry with Blue than with her. Except in this one Blue is pretty over his shit. The Star Lord and the Raptor Squad shtick got old already. The rest of the cast is just there. It’s like they decided the actors were recognizable enough that they didn’t have to write characters for them. So instead of “this is a character” it’s “Hey! The coop computer guy from Civil War! Hey! It’s James Cromwell! Hey, it’s the guy that was Thor in Adventures in Babysitting! Hey, it’s White Rose from Mister Robot!”

I will say that Howard deserves some credit. She put in the work. Also, there’s no stupidity like like a woman in high heels outrunning a T Rex in foot. She actually gets a badass moment... but it falls flat like the rest.

Oddly enough, Pratt is probably the best part of the movie. He gets the best lines at least, and a couple of jokes that are actually funny.

The tone of this movie is really weird, too. It’s like it’s trying to be a an ironic comedy-horror but it’s afraid to commit to the comedy or the horror. There isn’t a single dinosaur mauling or death in the movie that isn’t played for humor, or treated with gravity. It tries really hard to stay family friendly, but it’s idea of family friendly is casual sadism with the gore discretely just our of frame.

I think this one is a case of Cinematoc Universe Disease. They obviously want to make a Jurassic World movie that delivers the premise promised by the ending of this flick, but for some reason feel obligated to waste two hours of the audiences’ time reconnecting to characters no one likes so they can tell a story that could have been relegated to five minutes of exposition.

Oh, and while I’m piling on this dumb movie, the only way they can top the stupid name they gave the genetically engineered dinosaur in this movie (again? really?) is if Jurassic World 3’s villain dinosaur is named “Evilsaurus Fux”
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Postby silvermoonlight » Fri Jun 22, 2018 3:13 am

View Original PostChuckman wrote:The ending was so profoundly stupid that I don’t know what on God’s green earth they intended with it.


I heard the ending was about making some sort planet of the apes scenario like humanity being forced to live along side dinosaurs, but in a modern age film this falls utterly flat on it's face in my view as Apes works because in the first film it makes it clear that human's got almost wiped out by a deadly virus of there own making hence the fallen world makes sense in the follow up films and why you have a species clash.

I feel like this script would have been better as a new franchise enterally that has nothing to do with Jurassic Park and instead they could have done a One Million Years B.C take or even a take on the Ark Survival Games (Which have human's trying to tame dinosaurs and even riding them) as this would have worked as they could have started the first movie as the downfall of modern humanity, followed by the sequels being about living with and learning to tame dinosaurs and putting new tech on them.

Riding dinos for kicks  SPOILER: Show
Image
Last edited by silvermoonlight on Fri Jun 22, 2018 4:44 am, edited 2 times in total.
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Postby Chuckman » Fri Jun 22, 2018 4:32 am

That’s actually what it needed. Besides the script being shit, it lacks conviction. They keep doing the cinematic universe teasing thing. They should just start subtitling all these movies “the next one will be good we promise”

You might even say... they were so concerned with whether or not they should, they never stopped to ask if they could.
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Postby silvermoonlight » Fri Jun 22, 2018 4:59 am

View Original PostChuckman wrote:That’s actually what it needed. Besides the script being shit, it lacks conviction. They keep doing the cinematic universe teasing thing. They should just start subtitling all these movies “the next one will be good we promise”

You might even say... they were so concerned with whether or not they should, they never stopped to ask if they could.


I agree 100 percent with this, this is also why I don't like a lot of modern reboots they feel like pure misguided cash grabs which use fan service and nostalgia to play on the audiences child hood memories but in a hugely insincere manner. The most common complaint I hear is "You stepped on my childhood" and at first I thought that maybe this was people complaining because they needed something to rant about but now I think they all have a point and if your going to do a reboot you should be doing because you love a franchise and want to give it lots of respect not because you want to fill your pockets with cash.
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Postby Gendo'sPapa » Fri Jun 22, 2018 9:00 am

Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom is a bad movie - director J.A. Bayona does what he can with the script he's got and does force out a couple solid set pieces - that exists for one reason & one reason only....
To set up the third movie that is being directed by Colin Trevorrow (Release Date: June 11, 2021). He even basically admitted as much in an interview - can't remember where and can't be bothered to look - where he talked about how this whole trilogy "only" exists so they can get to the third movie. This is very much a case of they had an idea for one movie - Jurassic World 3 - and then stretched that out to a trilogy to triple the profits.

Frankly, the series should have just gone full gonzo with the original idea for Jurassic Park 4 which was to be about a team of Human + Dog + Dinosaur hybrid super-soldiers who smoke stogies, fire big-ass guns & are medicated with adrenaline & serotonin to keep them under control.

https://io9.gizmodo.com/5950364/scrapped-concept-art-from-jurassic-park-4-shows-off-insane-dinosaur-commandos

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Postby Chuckman » Fri Jun 22, 2018 10:04 am

I know! If you’re going to double down on that dumbass “weaponized dinosaurs” idea, don’t just make an uglier raptor. Give it cyborg chaingun arms or rocket launchers or some shit. Fucking commit to it, not this weaksauce shit.

This is worse than Iron Man 2; at least when they made Iron Man 2 they didn’t make a movie that felt like a never-used sequel script from 1996 that was passed on for being too bland.

A post apocalyptic dinosaur movie is a fantastic idea. Why didn’t they just fucking make that?

This is why of all the various CU attempts, only Marvel and the Godzilla one are working: The others will not dare to be stupid. They were won’t take any risks for fear of going too far. Fuck, even Star Wars has the same problem now.

Also if Trevorrowhatever his name is is directing the next one, fifty bucks says there’s a lengthy scene where a screaming woman is tortured by dinosaurs for no reason and swallowed whole. Probably in a bikini this time. Dude went to the Joss Whedon School of Fetish Shoehorning.
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Postby silvermoonlight » Fri Jun 22, 2018 10:47 am

View Original PostChuckman wrote:I know! If you’re going to double down on that dumbass “weaponized dinosaurs” idea, don’t just make an uglier raptor. Give it cyborg chaingun arms or rocket launchers or some shit. Fucking commit to it, not this weaksauce shit.

A post apocalyptic dinosaur movie is a fantastic idea. Why didn’t they just fucking make that?


I would totally have been up for that as well it sounds awesome and I'm shocked that Hollywood didn't try since Ray Harryhausen valley of gwangi shows you can put dinosaurs in modern settings so long as you have a bloody good story to back it up and if the audience can buy cowboys throwing ropes on an dinosaur on horse back they can buy a raptor with a machine gun and armour plating in a post apocalyptic dinosaur world.

SPOILER: Show
Valley of gwangi
Image
The Proof that the concept works is already in Ark survival.
Image



Also if Trevorrowhatever his name is is directing the next one, fifty bucks says there’s a lengthy scene where a screaming woman is tortured by dinosaurs for no reason and swallowed whole. Probably in a bikini this time. Dude went to the Joss Whedon School of Fetish Shoehorning.


You mean torturer porn because what the Jurassic world first woman eating scene was, I have a feeling after his third movies bombs because he can't direct for shit he'll proberbly go in to horror because he would fit right in there in the I hate women and love to stamp on them B movie section.
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Postby Gus Hanson » Sat Jun 23, 2018 8:20 pm

The Transformers: The Movie

This was the very first TF entry i ever saw before all the live action hoopla. Because of that, i find myself indifferent to the first generation robots being replaced. My favorite side quest involves the scenes with Hot Rod, Kup, and the Dinobots.
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Postby Guy Nacks » Sat Jun 23, 2018 11:38 pm

View Original PostGendo'sPapa wrote:Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom is a bad movie


Just from the trailer alone, it looked like it was going to be absolute shit and I had zero interest in seeing it.I was holding out some small modicum of hope that it might be passable fare, but it looks like I needn't waste my time.

Thus, JW:FK will be the first Jurassic Park movie I will not have seen in theaters since the original film (which couldn't be helped because I was too young)
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Postby Chuckman » Sun Jun 24, 2018 12:36 am

I will definitely at least wait for reviews on the next one.

I mean, at least The Hobbit puts me to sleep.
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Postby El Squibbonator » Mon Jun 25, 2018 12:46 am

This is kind of old news, but does anyone know how Isle of Dogs is doing worldwide? Box Office Mojo lists it as having earned $62 million worldwide, but some of its entires for various countries—notably China and Britain—haven't been updated in weeks. Taking that into account, it's possible that it's passed the $70 million mark worldwide.
Also, do we have any idea what it's budget is? I imagine it wouldn't be much higher than that of Fantastic Mr. Fox. The closest thing I can find to a solid figure is a single tweet: https://twitter.com/platypusrex256/status/992145452937052161. But that just raises more questions than it answers. Like, why has no one who worked on the movie mentioned the budget? Where did the person who made the tweet get that number? And why is it so much less than what Fantastic Mr. Fox cost?
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Postby Chuckman » Mon Jun 25, 2018 3:57 pm

The animated Batman/Harley Quinn movie is free with Amazon Prime so I watched parts of it yesterday. I say parts because I fast forwarded through a lot.

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Re: Last Movie You Watched

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Postby El Squibbonator » Mon Jun 25, 2018 9:12 pm

Anybody care to answer my question about Isle of Dogs?
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Re: Last Movie You Watched

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Postby Gendo'sPapa » Tue Jun 26, 2018 9:03 am

Shrug. No idea to the Isle of Dogs question. Independent movies, even animated ones about dogs, don't really travel far internationally. $62 million sounds about right to me. Boxofficemojo is the premiere source for this kind of info so I have to trust what they have is correct. They probably haven't updated what the film did in a lot of foreign nations because the film has run its course there or the changes are so infinitesimal that they'll just wait until the movies theatrical run is over.
Would be surprised if Isle of Dogs hits $70 million worldwide, especially now that the film is beginning the next step of distribution now which is streaming (the movie is available for streaming purchase on iTunes as of today).


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