esselfortium wrote:He
thinks he's just like Shinji, but I don't really think we should take his interpretation at face value. We know Shinji better than he does.
Gendo is just like Shinji to the extent that both suffer from the "hedgehog dilemma". They both fear being hurt by others, and they both suffer from being alone.
They differ in how they approach things:
- Shinji believes that it is wrong to "run away". Therefore, he tries to connect to people, even though it is painful to him. But everything blows up in his face in the end, and he loses everyone who is dear to him.
- Gendo has chosen to "run away" long ago, because everything blew up in his face when he lost Yui. Yui was everything to him, and he lost her.
Gendo is what Shinji would become, if Shinji would give up and simply chooses to "run away".
This becomes clear to us, the audience, as Gendo delivers his final speech. Gendo does not recognize that Shinji has the same problem that he has; rather, I believe Gendo simply regards Shinji as the son that he always kept at arm's length, and who was always afraid to be a father to, because he believes himself incapable of being a good father. Gendo believed the best thing he could do for Shinji, was to give him his mother back, in any way possible.
And of course, by refusing to be a father at all, Gendo becomes a phenomenally bad father. This is what Gendo realizes in the end, and it is significant that the very last thing he said is Shinji's name. I don't think he ever spoke it anywhere else.