Strike it rich?

[Fazmotron]

I'd buy an island and some sheep. Then all my needs would be satisfied.

Are you from New Zealand?

[THE Hal E. Burton 9000]

in essence, what I'd do...

Bill Strannix: What are you gonna do when you get two hundred million dollars in the bank?
Commander Krill: Buy the presidency!

anyone who knows which movie this is from gets an invisible cookie

[honsou]

-A nice quiet, peaceful place that is far away from New York City(I hate this place)

Your a horrible person, the first thing I'd do is buy an apartment in NYC. Then I'd get a SF4 arcade machine. After that I guess I would go to every sporting event I would ever want to attend. Finally I'd get the complete works of Go Nagai translated into english.

I'd put the rest away to live comfortably and give some to the right charities

[Synapsid]

Well, I suppose I wouldn't have to worry about buying textbooks.

I'd put it in the stock market and watch it all vanish.

Or, I would get a Viking ship and a crew so I can spend my days raiding churches along the coast of England.

You could always use it to acquire all the deflated capital around, once the inflation kicks in it should appreciate... Then again given the financial collapse of Iceland and the Baltics you may have a good source of unemployed Norse to hire. Although I doubt the churches have enough value to satisfy the Vikings.

I'd buy a mistress.

It's a time honored tradition amongst British gentlemen right?

[Axell]

obviously unmentionable things that would embarrass you huh?

It's more a lazy place-filler ("And... stuff") for "things I can't be bothered to compile into list form at the moment". It'd probably amount to a fairly boring list of necessities and hobby-based frivolities. I probably can say that I wouldn't squander lots of cash in ripe excess. 99% chance my lifestyle wouldn't reflect the amount of money I had stashed away.

your no fun reichu

[Reichu]

your no fun reichu

Oh, I see, it's like THAT... Well, then.

- I would commission a Real Doll. Of a naked Eva. Size of a tall person for convenience, and fully usable.
- I would buy vast amounts of sex toys, many of them grotesque and Cronenbergian, others so utterly horrible even Cthulhu's orifices would cower in fear.
- I would hire a tall, skinny, vaguely effeminate Japanese-descended gigolo, have him dye his hair purple, make him wear a Greek cross pendant, and then ravish him until every last milliliter of virginity is drained from my body forever.
- I would also finance ludicrous biotechnology studies in a foreign country that has no enforced system of ethics, and make myself the test subject for a series of horrible experiments that would result in my painful mutation into a theropod-spider-Eva thing. My vagina dentata would then proceed to take over the world.

[Mr. Tines]

99% chance my lifestyle wouldn't reflect the amount of money I had stashed away.

This. Apart from trading money for time for various things (food preparation, nursing care), I've pretty much carried on the same lifestyle as 30-odd years ago when an impoverished research student, even though I have savings enough (at current values) to cover some years' worth of normal expenditure.

I feel like no-one has posted the obvious yet...

Well, I was thinking in that general direction, but just less greedily. I guess I'm just more easily satiated. Or just getting a bit long in the tooth. Also, possibly related to this thread.

Well, I apologize for prying.

It's not really prying if I can cite you a references on the internets.

by darn it, it's high time we had a flying car!

Truth.

[Captain_Morgan]

- I would commission a Real Doll. Of a naked Eva. Size of a tall person for convenience, and fully usable.

Hawt.

I would buy alcohol. Lots, and lots of alcohol. And a new liver for when I've grown out of the current one.

Then I would purchase a tower in the middle of a city, from which I shall find my perch and high powered-rifle and hunt the most dangerous game...the North American Swallow.

Once my bloodlust has been sated, I will then drive through the city, recreating Death Race 2000 through my drunk driving. 50 points.

[Alaska Slim]

- I would also finance ludicrous biotechnology studies in a foreign country that has no enforced system of ethics, and make myself the test subject for a series of horrible experiments that would result in my painful mutation into a theropod-spider-Eva thing. My vagina dentata would then proceed to take over the world.

Oh God... hmm, you know what? Talk to this guy, he seems to be of the same mind.

And by getting the freaks together it will be all the more simple to have them eliminated MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!1!!!!one!!!1!

Slim: FRANK! SHUT UP!... you're giving it away...

It's not really prying if I can cite you a references on the internets.

Yes, I said it also to keep myself from asking questions that need not be asked nor is my business to know.

With many things I find ignorance is indeed bliss, which is why I have forgotten my own age, so I would no longer inadvertently add it to the age of my mother when she gave birth to me, thus figuring out her age. I mean I still know the year, so I could, Oh...Oh dear God... She's... Eh- YOU S.O.B- oh damn, I'm that old already? Well, would explain my lack of energy recently... and all those candles...

[honsou]

- I would commission a Real Doll. Of a naked Eva. Size of a tall person for convenience, and fully usable.

Assuming this would be a male doll, I've never heard of a male Real Doll and a human sized Eva real doll might be one of the scariest thing that is possible using a real doll...and that's saying something

[Ironfoot]

-Invest in gold and related commodities

-Invest in royalty trusts to guarantee a consistent cash flow

-Set aside money for publishing my 12 volume sci-fi series, once I actually write the whole thing

-Design my own mansion and have it built in the Caribbean (or in an alternate tropical location that is not as susceptible to Hurricanes and the like)

-Most importantly, live comfortably without ever having to repay any loan ever again, with the destiny of my own dollars in MY control.

On the side, I may choose to convert a portion of my assets into a foreign currency as a backup of turbulent US Markets, most likely into a Swiss vault such as UBS. Also, this does not include all of the kinky shit that I will probably indulge myself in. Those are private expenses. >

[BobBQ]

I would found Outer Heaven.

[Mr. Tines]

- I would commission a Real Doll. Of a naked Eva. Size of a tall person for convenience, and fully usable.

Assuming this would be a male doll

Of a naked Eva, dude.

[Axell]

your no fun reichu

Oh, I see, it's like THAT... Well, then.

- I would commission a Real Doll. Of a naked Eva. Size of a tall person for convenience, and fully usable.
- I would buy vast amounts of sex toys, many of them grotesque and Cronenbergian, others so utterly horrible even Cthulhu's orifices would cower in fear.
- I would hire a tall, skinny, vaguely effeminate Japanese-descended gigolo, have him dye his hair purple, make him wear a Greek cross pendant, and then ravish him until every last milliliter of virginity is drained from my body forever.
- I would also finance ludicrous biotechnology studies in a foreign country that has no enforced system of ethics, and make myself the test subject for a series of horrible experiments that would result in my painful mutation into a theropod-spider-Eva thing. My vagina dentata would then proceed to take over the world.

see i knew you were a sick and twisted person person

[Defectron]

Assuming this would be a male doll

Even if it was, it probably wouldn't have a penis regardless of gender. Could you tell if it was male, female or hermaphrodite by looking at it? I doubt it.


Lets see, I would make my own anime series, and I would also investigate paranormal stuff like the skinwalker ranch using my crack team of investigators. I'll bring Action Bastard along as well to use as bait for anything interesting we run into. I'll also buy cool stuff like cutting lasers, a mocap suit, a life size alien figure to stick in my closet, a high class samurai katana and other stuff. Also I'll put a lot in savings.

[Reichu]

Assuming this would be a male doll, I've never heard of a male Real Doll and a human sized Eva real doll might be one of the scariest thing that is possible using a real doll...and that's saying something

No, no, it would be quite female... And male Realdolls (one word, apparently) do exist, but they're not being manufactured at the moment.

I actually am genuinely curious if, given enough $$$, Realdoll would satisfy such a commission. And, if they did, would they include the finished product in their online portfolio, or would they try to forget they ever made the hideous thing?

Out of curiosity, Ojisan, what is preventing you from "buying" a mistress at the current time, i.e., without having the equivalent of $24 million US in hand? (I don't really know what such things involve...)

[Mr. Tines]

Out of curiosity, Ojisan, what is preventing you from "buying" a mistress at the current time, i.e., without having the equivalent of $24 million US in hand? (I don't really know what such things involve...)

Neither do I but I believe it involves owning a sports-car and similar conspicuous consumption (of similar magnitude of expenditure to my reserves) as a signal. That or hiring them at a rate even more extortionate than getting personal nursing care in for 2 hours a day.

Being able to casually offer a million in a trust fund would both avoid all the tedious negotiation for price, and widen the market significantly.

[Synapsid]

- I would hire a tall, skinny, vaguely effeminate Japanese-descended gigolo, have him dye his hair purple, make him wear a Greek cross pendant, and then ravish him until every last milliliter of virginity is drained from my body forever.
- I would also finance ludicrous biotechnology studies in a foreign country that has no enforced system of ethics, and make myself the test subject for a series of horrible experiments that would result in my painful mutation into a theropod-spider-Eva thing. My vagina dentata would then proceed to take over the world.

That's the spirit Reichuu! The Chinese are already putting up genetically altered stem cells, and there's no shortage of Jpop stars to capture for a worthy cause! Would the end result be some sort of enlightened despot rule for humanity, or third impact via denta?

[BrikHaus]

I would have the long awaited Berserk season 2 animated. And also, a proper conclusion to Giant Robo: The Day the Earth Stood Still. I would also make sure all copies of Evangelion are wiped from the face of the planet. After that, I would buy my way into the Presidency of Planet Earth, and rule the world with an iron fist. Kneel before me, worthless peasants! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

[honsou]

I actually am genuinely curious if, given enough $$$, Realdoll would satisfy such a commission. And, if they did, would they include the finished product in their online portfolio, or would they try to forget they ever made the hideous thing?

I actually saw a documentary on Realdolls (it was the most creepy/depressing thing I've ever seen), they seem to be willing to make just about everything. I doubt they would be too weirded out by the concept...since the they make dolls which people actually have sex with. Must be hard to hit their threshold of weirdness.