Best EMF Quotes?

[Sailor Star Dust]

These are the only ones I can find, but I know there are others which are real gems (Create your own EoE Ending: Rei twitching; cue After the End, something about Intinal Faggotry, etc etc)

Reichu:
Episode #25 (Reichu Mod) wrote:
Shinji:
Why am I piloting this thing again?
Mom! I know you're in there!

MOM:
You don't have to "pilot" this time.
You just have to clutch at the controls and scream a lot.
Is that fair?

Shinji:
I can live with that!


Episode #25' (Reichu Mod) wrote:
KYOKO:
Asuka-chan... Your mama has been in HEL-- here all along...
She loves you with all her heart and soul, and all she wants to do is KI-- protect you.
Please take my hand so that we may DI-- fight together as one!

Asuka:
Yippy skippy! Whatever you say Mama!
Isn't that right, Osaru-chan?

OSARU-CHAN:
Chu-chu! That's right, chu!

KYOKO:
I HAVE YOU NOW!!!!!!... my precious little angel,
where nothing and no one can ever hurt you again EXCEPT ME.

Asuka:
Osaru-chan, did you hear a high screechy voice in the background just now?

OSARU-CHAN:
Not a thing, chu!

KYOKO:
GYAAAAAAAAHHHHH EYE HALATIONS OPTICAL ENERGY PROJECTION POINTLESS RELIGIOUS SYMBOLISM!!!

JSSDF DUDES:
zomg wtf!?

KYOKO:
GWAARRRRRRRRR RAW ELECTRICITY SURGES INTO ME!
MY DODGY CHARACTER DESIGN OVERHAUL BE DAMNED!
TAKE THAT MOTHERFUCKERS!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHRRGGGGGHHH!!!

Asuka:
DOOOOOOOOORYYYAAAAAAAAA!!!

KYOKO:
Oh, so you're gonna play along, huh?
You're more naive than I thought, but whatever.
Scream, girl, scream! The JSSDFers won't hear you but who cares!

Asuka:
Mama, Mama, I get it now!

KYOKO:
Suuuuuuuure you do.

Asuka:
The ATF and stuff!

KYOKO:
Ohhhhh yeah, babies, check out Mama's 1337 5|<1||2. GROOOOOUUURMPH!

Asuka:
It's so nifty!
You're watching me!
You're protecting me!
OHMYGOD ITS SO COOL IM SO HAPPY RETROGRESSING INTO A CHILD-LIKE STATE IS FUN!

KYOKO:
Then leave the controls alone, sit in the plug, and let Mama handle this. You look like an idiot.

JSSDF DUDE:
CUT THE CORD, BITCHES.

KYOKO:
Fuck. Only five minutes to set up Operation Let's Die Together.
I better get it right this time.

Asuka:
YOU GUYS CAN'T STOP ME! I GOT LOTS OF ARMOR AND STUFF!

KYOKO:
n00b, the armor doesn't do shit.

Asuka:
AND THE A.T. FIELD!

KYOKO:
...Better.

Asuka:
HAY CHECK IT OUT GUYS, I KNOW KUNG FU!!!!

KYOKO:
NO, you DON'T.
UGH, fucking VTOLs, do they auto-respawn or something?

VTOL:
Yessum. But if you destroy the spawning points,
you can make us stop, at least until you leave this area and then return, upon which the Great Will of the Macrocosm will have reset
everything that annoys you the most.

KYOKO:
Will it reset my umbilical cable?
I find those things PRET-ty fucking annoying, I must say.

VTOL:
I'm sorry, ma'am, but that's a heavily guarded military secret.

KYOKO:
Oh, for love of...

:kicks VTOL: :kaboom:

KYOKO:
GU-U-U-U-U-RRRRRRRRRRRRRrrrrrrrrr...

Asuka:
DURRR HURRRRRR FIRE IS COOL.

MaggotMaster:
Reichu wrote:
Episode #25' (Reichu Mod) wrote:
words

You've been reading too many of my posts.

Me, in regards to Passage of Time (EoE Final Scene thread)
*Good, or Don't Be begins to play as my stupidity finally(?) comes to an end*
Me: "It all makes sense now...you've opened my eyes!"
Reichu: "Omedetou! Now get the hell out of this topic!"
Maggot Master: "DON'T ACT LIKE A DUMBASS. LOL!"
Tines-san: "...Cyber-punk Novel." *nods*
Me: "Arigatou. *smile*"

My plan involves heavy (fan)wanking and Enzyte. Lots of Enzyte. I'll make Bob look like he only has a clitoris, and then I'll homerun both teams with MY BIG AWESOME WANG OF WANGNESS, right outta the stadium.

You leave me out of this, or I'll be forced to use my Colt!

Different Bob, BQ. Please, put the gun down... TT There's no reason to start shooting anyone... :shock:

So, which ones do YOU think are the best? Funniest, well-thought-out, whatever... ;)

[BobBQ]

HI, I'M MAGGOT MASTER, CEO AND FOUNDER OF OH GOD WHAT THE HELL INDUSTRIES

It's Sadamoto's Final Battle Form.

...I follow you both online and offline, and I am a 4-dimensional manifestation of absolute evil...

(Create your own EoE Ending: Rei twitching; cue After the End..., etc etc)

This one, I assume?

Shinji and Asuka are lying on the beach after Third Impact, neither thinking or doing very much.

Then Gendo walks out of the LCL and pushes his glasses up his nose. "Rei?"

The giant half-a-GNR's-head twitches. "Yes... sir?"

"The results are acceptable. We will do it again."

A normal-sized Rei steps out of the LCL, followed by the entire main cast. "Yes, sir."

Shinji curls into a ball. "I mustn't run away... I mustn't run away... I mustn't run away..."

Cue After the End.

[Fearthebait]

This one, I assume?

BobBQ wrote:
Shinji and Asuka are lying on the beach after Third Impact, neither thinking or doing very much.

Then Gendo walks out of the LCL and pushes his glasses up his nose. "Rei?"

The giant half-a-GNR's-head twitches. "Yes... sir?"

"The results are acceptable. We will do it again."

A normal-sized Rei steps out of the LCL, followed by the entire main cast. "Yes, sir."

Shinji curls into a ball. "I mustn't run away... I mustn't run away... I mustn't run away..."

Cue After the End.

that would be crazy

[Sailor Star Dust]

Smith, you wrote that one? A-Nice!

I also like these (parpahrased):

"So...she's in love with him, but finds him pathetic?" "Don't ya just love the human mind?"

LOLZ Navery and AEF.

This thread's about me now? That sucks!

Ever since I was accused of having an army of zombie-esque "Yes Men", however, occasional divergences in thought between myself and the Comrades haven't felt like such a bad thing.

(Reichu, who said such crap, anyway?)

I mean, if Shinji WAS alone for awhile, wouldn't the storyboards or some on-screen text or something say so?

[drinian]

Anime unites us all. Much better than the Olympics.

Did he ever actually say that here, or was it just in someone's .sig for a long time?

I hope this show goes down in history as one of the absolute worst anime series ever written. It's like the first episode is a microcosm of sheer awesomeness, and then it ventures into a vaste wasteland of tits, ass, more tits, panties, more panties, more tits again, then tits and ass, and then tits, ass, and panties, and finally, more tits. And then you wonder, "Where is this going?", becuase the series isn't advancing to any sort of climaxing finale. And then in the last three episodes, it abruptly tries to go back to the type of feel of the first episode, only to fail miserably, because they failed to develop the characters in the first place. And in the end, the token male character has to prove to the token submissive female's split succubus of doom personality that he truly does love her. The only problem with this horrible cliche is that the story doesn't give the viewer any reason to believe he does beyond the fact that she's some ficle ideal girl that he desired.

Kono Minikuku mo Utsukushii Sekai gets a big F-, and if you disagree, you can go slit your wrists and jump off a cliff and get sucked into a low flying jet engine because you're retarded and shouldn't be allowed to breed for any reason whatsoever.

[Sailor Star Dust]

ZOMG, I always loved that quote by EM!

I'm not sure I want to see an Adam derived orgasm... It might be pretty messy coming from some of the bigger angels. :shock:

[Sailor Star Dust]

"I'm Kaworu. Kaworu Nagisa. The Fifth Children. I'm my own mother, the byproduct of my own rape. My siblings are also my children. I blew up, yet here I am, a 4billion year old existance trapped in a pathetic Lilim body that is not mine. Life sucks when you're the hybrid bastard child of two branches of humanity."

LOL fixed.

[Reichu]

I'll add stuff here if I ever happen to be poking around in the thread and can thus provide a link.

Ever since I was accused of having an army of zombie-esque "Yes Men", however, occasional divergences in thought between myself and the Comrades haven't felt like such a bad thing.

(Reichu, who said such crap, anyway?)

DatDude, I think.

Anime unites us all. Much better than the Olympics.

Did he ever actually say that here, or was it just in someone's .sig for a long time?

Carl never posted it on the forum, but seventh said:

Carl Horn said that to me once! Words of a wise man!

[Eva Yojimbo]

ZOMG, I always loved that quote by EM!

I'm not sure I want to see an Adam derived orgasm... It might be pretty messy coming from some of the bigger angels. :shock:

Haha, I'm flattered. I've been on here less than a month and I already have one of the best quotes.

[Reichu]

Lots of great stuff emerges in forum antics. Sadly, I haven't written most of it down...

Something Katayoku no Tenshi thought was worth sigging:

Anno is the highest god in the pantheon, flanked by Masayuki and Tsurumaki. Sadamoto is one of the lesser, but better-known, gods, the patron deity of Illustration and Procrastination.

The only thing that can subvert Anno's power is the mysterious force known as "Moyoco" -- technically not a deity, but definitely to be feared.

Ditto:

The truth is, every idea in the universe -- past, present, future, etc. -- has been stolen from Zugzwang, and he is very angry about this indeed.

From this thread:

Why does Kaworu never show his palms?

Because that is where his vaginas are.

From some thread + a PM:

I don't like Asuka because she's a self-deluding, whiny bitch who wouldn't know what was good for her if it wrung her neck like a wet towel.

Are you insinuating that Shinji might make a good mother?

From this thread:

...using the first two [images] as a guide to where NGE dicks hang from, it's not impossible that GNK still morphs one.

But that would mean that Giant Naked Rei, who is sharing a pelvis with GNK, would also have a dick, and only futanari fans would want that.

True, but there's something in Evangelion for everyone, and even people who like dickgirls need fanservice too. Gainax wouldn't want to alienate a consumer market by leaving out the futanari fans.

From this thread:

Kaworu is a male. Adam is an asexual male.

The end.

(Pokes Rawinder.)

Ni!

MaggotMaster has quite a few, I know. Although I can't recall where they are at the moment.

[Anonymous_Evafan]

I found this a funny one. It's about what the Angels are.

actually its kinda funny...

the first time you EVER see Evangelion...its like...zomg Aliums!!!

then later its...not aliums???

then later its like...ACTUAL ANGELS!?!?!?!

and now it turns out they were MOTHAF**KIN ALIUMS!!!

[Reichu]

New one:

...if [a fanfiction] makes me want to go have sex with a fake anime character, then it's done its job.

[Fearthebait]

hey! thats me :o

[thewayneiac]

Since this was in a P.M. I probably shouldn't say who wrote it, but the greatest Eva Monkey Forums quote ever is:

Re: Rozen Maiden:

*gets on hands and knees* Thank you great wayneiac for introducing me to this show. I shall forever sing praises in your name and bathe in the blood of live boars while worshiping a golden statue made in your image.

[MaggotMaster]

why the hell am i being quoted ITT i only post bullshit nonsense that contributes nothing and have been posting extremely little lately because internet

[Defectron]

Heres a quote from oberon 03

I actually became an anime because of this.

Yeah, not too many people actually become an anime...

[Fearthebait]

i have. got a preoblem with it?

[TriLink]

Heres a quote from oberon 03

I actually became an anime because of this.

Yeah, not too many people actually become an anime...

Dosen't count (it's obviously a typo)

[Fearthebait]

but how are you sure? did S.C. tell you?

[Defectron]

Typos still count if their funny