Ritsuko Akagi said, "That's a excellent recommendation. Time I put that to use..."
And so the gremlins plaguing the bus shrieked and fled before this scene could be edited into the fanfic.
Moderator: Board Staff
Kyoko and Toji's mother shouted, "You're not an anarchist, you're just a dictator and a pervert!"
That hit V with a blast that singed his clothes and left him smoking. He tried to speak, but no words would come. He had been silenced.
Pen-Pen, Shinji, Toji and Kensuke looked at each other and said, as one, "Let's do this!"
V tried to move, but the last attack had paralyzed him and rooted him to the spot.
"We all exist no matter what you think of us or what you want us to be! We aren't your interpretations or your misconceptions! We are what we are, and we'll create our future with our own hands, together as friends, free from tyrants like you! The future we want is not the future you shall hand down to us! JUST WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK WE ARE?!!"
And at that, V was utterly annihilated and a huge cloud of spiral energy shot out from the cast. The entire town was leveled and reduced to heaps of kindling. Nothing remained.
"We're ghost-free now." Rei said, smiling.
Shinji stared at her. "Wait a moment. Are you Rei's big sister or something?"
"Uhmmm...something like that, I guess? Yui Ikari, pleased to meet you!" the young woman said, with a smile.
"Anta Baka? She's your MOM, you moron!" Asuka yelled.
"MOM?" Shinji's jaw fell open. It didn't stay down for long, because the two Eva transporters were joined by two new Eva transporters - one carrying a blue Eva with one red eye, the other carrying a horned purple Eva with green highlights.
Toji and his mom promptly crossed their arms, Gunbuster style, and said, "Eva-03 Tonfa Drill Mode, Activate!!!"
Eva-03 immediately went into the Gunbuster pose, almost lazily waving its Tonfas to deflect Sanageyama's increasingly desperate and ill-aimed blows.
And then its Tonfas turned into drills that chewed up Sanageyama's kendo sword! Sanageyama stared at the drilled-down remains of his sword.
"HELP! This isn't the first time this has happened! And how do I compensate for my wiener now?!?!?!"
Eva-03 grabbed Sanageyama's "mountain monkey" uniform and punched it hard, knocking it down. Toji and his mom continued the bashing until Sanageyama said, "Okay! I give up! I give up!"
Jakuzure was struggling to drown the classical Jazz selection from Eva-00 with her classical music and growing more and more off-tune as she did so.
"Say, you'sh getting a little tone-deaf here, see? Snakesh can't take it, see? Myeah." Rei 1 said.
Jakuzure snapped. "I'll fly high up and crush up from above, you dirty 1920s gangster wannabe you..."
Maya, her cheeks pink, said, "Ohhh, this is soooo romantic...I think I'm going to melt!" Entirely spontaneously, she grabbed Ritsuko and planted a huge smooch on her cheek.
Ritsuko said, "You've been..."
Maya said, "Always."
"I'm...I'm not the kind of person with a thing for girls...but I promise I'll be your friend and protector as long as I'm about and hammering the old keyboard."
Pen-Pen blew away all the romance by saying, "Valhalla, here we come!"
UrsusArctos wrote:This time around Ritsuko is a much better person in the absence of Gendo, so she's able to acknowledge and accept Maya's feelings for what they are even if she can't return them. I wanted her to have a much happier character arc than descending into villainy, especially since so many female scientists/academics get a bad reputation or are subject to discrimination on the basis of their gender to this day. Whatever her failings, I wanted Ritsuko to redeem herself, even if in a small way.
Kaworu walked up, smiling as ever. "Kaworu. Nagisa Kaworu. Pleased to meet you."
Sayaka and Misato stormed up to Kaworu and yelled together, "WHO'S YOUR MAMA?!?!"
Kaworu smiled wider and said, "I'm my own mama!"
Both Sayaka and Misato stared at Kaworu, jaws hanging open.
Hikari said, "This is confusing."
Kensuke said, "No kidding."
"Boring." Misato said.
"Predictable." Ritsuko said.
Hikari said, "Why is this fic starting to get boring?"
Maya said, "Because there's too many of us and too little to do!"
Mana Kirishima looked at the advancing mob of Evas and said, "Let these guys go with their own shenanigans! I'm tired of waiting!"
With a loud whooosh and a tornado-like cloud of dust, the Yak-43UM landed with Kensuke inside it. He yelled, "Oye, Toji, I need someone to handle all the weapons on this thing!"
Toji said, "Can't. I'm gonna go with my mom to beat up those Frankenstein-Eva-thingies!"
Ragyo wiped tears from her eyes and Nui dusted herself off.
Ragyo said, "Do what you want!"
Nui said, "La vie est drole!"
Ragyo said, "And it's buffoons like this who make it so amusing..."
Amuro stood still, hands on his hips. "Usagi! Ami! Makoto! Minako! Rei! Snap out of it, the lot of you!"
The senshi stood to attention.
Amuro glowered at them from behind his orange gar-glasses. "You're all meant to be pretty sailor-suited soldiers of justice, but what's gotten into you? Over the course of this fanfic, you have attempted to kidnap Shinji and turn him into Tuxedo Kamen, gone hopelessly out of character as bad girls and now you've just given in to Ragyo's life-fiber shenanigans and beat up Satsuki and the Four Devas! What do you have to say for yourself?"
Usagi said, "It seems like a fanfic written by a person who may or may not be a bear isn't a very good place for us to be..."
"NONSENSE! It's because you're all lazy! You're all too lazy to see or do the obvious!" Amuro yelled.
"W...we are?" Rei asked.
"Drill through the heavens and seize your future for yourselves! You are who you are, and neither fanfic authors nor fangirls decide who you are, or what you want to be. Your purity is actually meant to be a source of strength, right? Either show what you're made of or find another job - reincarnation or no reincarnation, the average fangirl could do better than you so-called 'princesses'! Now get to it!" Amuro yelled.
Nui tossed a bunch of life-fiber control threads at the Sailor Senshi, but this time the threads plonked flat instead of going into their brains.
Ragyo scowled. "Nui, you're being an amateur! This is how a pro does it..."
Ragyo tried the same trick, only to have it fall flat.
As Shinji picked up his cello and went to music class, he went past the cosplay club. The boys and girls there were dressed in strange-looking costumes, and strangely familiar ones too.
Kaworu stepped in for a moment. "Arael, do you mind joining us? We need your lovely singing voice."
A smallish girl wearing a bright headlamp and a costume with brightly glowing Angel wings said, "Hallelujah, mama! Here I come!"
Shinji didn't know what he'd just heard but the light was too bright for his eyes, "Do you mind turning the light off? It's like it's shining into my brains!"
Arael turned it off with a "Whoops, sorry! Bad habit of mine!"
The other kids called out to Kaworu, and Shinji heard even weirder stuff.
A girl in a costume that made her look like a red uterine system said in a very sultry voice, "Mamma, honey, are you sure you won't join us?"
Users browsing this forum: amitakartok and 1 guest