Neon Genesis Evanbritanion

For Eva-related fan projects: fanfiction, fanart, AMVs, and other creations. Share your work and discuss others' here.

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funkwolf
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Neon Genesis Evanbritanion

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Postby funkwolf » Thu Dec 13, 2012 8:10 am

Just for a joke I want you to picture Shinji as a badass (Damn it, I can't even write that without laughing). I'm going to give you a short extract I completely made up and then I want you guys to discuss whether or not it works. Keep in mind it's not something that I'm working on, I just want you to discuss whether or not this works for Shinji.

"You haven't stopped brooding since I showed you Tokyo-3." Shinji raises his head slightly to show his awareness of Misato. "What's the matter?"
"I was stuffed into a shitload of metal and made to fight a monster that nobody else at Nerv could fight, there must of been something in their job description that said they were going to be defending against attack. But I can't seem to recall much of that going on; just me, a robot and a load of pussies cowering behind me while I saved their asses from a bigger asshole. So how do you think I feel?" Misato chooses to ignore this statement and no more is brought up about it. "Your things should have already been delivered, Shinji." Misato says before adding " I just moved into this apartment too." She stops at a door and swipes a card over the door's electronic lock pad, but nothing happens, she tries again, but nothing happens again. "Ahh come on, don't do this, just ope- hey wait a minute, Shinji what are you doing? Shinji?" Shinji ignores her protests as he pulls out a switch blade, flicks it, before twirling it in has hand and slamming the blade down into the electronic lock pad. The pad cracks and spark's fly off, giving the blade a red hot glow. Just then, the door jitters a bit before finally sliding fully open. Misato stares wide eyed, like a frightened child, before regaining her composure as Shinji steps into the apartment. "That will be coming out of your pocket." Misato says curtly. Shinji stops dead in his tracks before saying "Take it out of Commander Ikari's pocket." He clenches his fists before adding " Unless he's still too busy licking his own wounds." As the last word is said Shinji walks down the corridor and out of sight from Misato.

So what do you think of this Shinji? Too aggressive, brooding or does this style give a nice change of pace for his character?

Sound off below

Atropos
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Postby Atropos » Sat Dec 15, 2012 7:10 pm

Excellent. You characterized DJ perfectly. Bravo!

Dream
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Postby Dream » Sun Dec 16, 2012 3:33 am

Have to admit, part where Shinji took out his pocketknife and almost everything after was hysterical and really funny, the absurd badass tone of the story seems to be quite achieved.

That said, there seems to be problems in terms of formatting, i'm not very sure what, but something made it a bit of an eyesore to read, i don't know if it's because of the lack of paragraph leaving it as one big block of text or something else. Aside from that, it felt a bit too short, although then again this seems to be mostly a preview.

So, basically, i would say it's pretty funny and seems interesting.
"Every line is a joy" -Kaworu Nagisa.

"Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm." - Ralph Waldo Emerson.

driftking18594
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Postby driftking18594 » Sun Dec 16, 2012 1:26 pm

I always wonder what happens when badass!Shinjis meet Asuka. :lol:

TomasJC
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Postby TomasJC » Thu Dec 27, 2012 3:29 pm

^
Or even worse, Rei...
Not to mention his reaction after getting thumped by Touji. Hilarity will defiantly ensue.
"That's no way to treat an expensive musical instrument!" -Jim Steinman
"When I was growing up, there were two things that were unpopular in my house. One was me, and the other was my guitar." -Bruce Springsteen
"Alcohol is humanity's friend... Can I abandon a friend?" -Yang Wen-li
"...See you on the Dark Side Of The Moon~"


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