It all returns to nothing it all comes tumbling down

Asuka's eyes shot open and was followed by an overwhelming feeling of nausea. She rushed to her feet and threw open the entry plug door before hopping outside into the warm morning air. She staggered over to the rock face and took a few deep breaths in an attempt to delay the inevitable. Behind her she could hear the sound of Shinji dropping down onto the ground.

'Oh god... don't let him see me doing this... please.'

"Asuka, what's wrong?"

"Nothing!" She swallowed, "Just go away!"

"But Asuka..."

"Please just go-" It was too late for her to get anymore words out, the nausea overwhelmed her and she sank down to one knee. Pain shot through her stomach as she emptied what little there was in her stomach onto the ground below. She could feel Shinji's presence behind her as the boy had dashed forward, placing his hand on her back and using his other hand to hold her hair.

She groaned as the feeling subsided and rested her forehead against the rock. Her stomach hurt and tears had formed in her eyes. She let them fall as she took ragged breaths. She couldn't even remember the nightmare that had forced her to wake up in this state.

"I told you... to go away..."

"Are you alright Asuka?"

"Of course I'm not alright, I just threw up!"

"I know that but I mean..."

"I'll be fine, just... leave me alone."

Shinji protested against her instruction, "I'm not leaving you alone, you're not well! You never left me alone when I was like this!"

"I'm not you! I can't..." Asuka trailed off half way through making her point and cringed as more pain made its way around her stomach. She didn't want to outright tell him that his presence and seeing her in this state was humiliating for her. She knew he meant well but she really didn't want him nearby right now.

She continued, "Just... wait for me in the Entry Plug, please give me a few minutes."

Shinji backed away, "Okay but... if you need anything."

"Yeah I know! You're there, please just go away."

Shinji reluctantly went back to the entry plug as Asuka wiped away the tears in her eyes and moved gingerly to another point of the rock face. She slumped down with her back to the wall and hung her head between her legs taking in deep breaths.

'It's been so long since that's happened... I've always had nightmares but they haven't caused me to do that in a long time. Last person to see me like that was Mari. It was just as humiliating then as well. At least he kept my hair out of the way I suppose, one bright side.'

Her body trembling she rose to her feet and slowly made her way back to the entry plug. As she entered she saw Shinji sat up in their little makeshift bed. He was looking down clearly upset at what had transpired. Asuka rolled her eyes and climbed back in and sat down next to him.

"See, I'm all better now." She smiled weakly.

Shinji glanced up and looked Asuka over. He frowned as he saw her pale face and trembling legs, he shot her a similar glance that he used to with Misato back when he stayed with her, "No you're not, your body is trembling."

"It'll pass, it was just..." Asuka halted herself, surprised at how stern Shinji’s expression and voice was but she also needed something to wash the horrible taste out of her mouth, "Pass me my pack first."

Shinji passed her the pack and she pulled out one of the bottles of water. She unscrewed the cap before taking a few small mouthfuls.

"I'm sorry I got angry with you. It's just..." Asuka trailed off again trying to arrange what she was saying correctly to not offend Shinji. In the end she just came out and said it, "I'm not like you or others, I don't do showing weakness in front of people very well. Not sure if you've noticed that in the past or not..."

"I've never really noticed..." Stated Shinji with just a slight hint of a smile and sarcasm.

Asuka only glared at him, "Good to see your concern for me has shifted to sarcasm. Look I'm just not very good at being weak or ill in front of others, it feels embarrassing and degrading."

"I understand but it's not like you could help it and..."

"Just stop talking about it. I know I couldn't and it's not like I'm not grateful to you for holding my hair back and being nice it's just dented my pride that’s all. Especially considering it was because of a stupid nightmare."

"A nightmare?"

Asuka nodded, "Are you surprised? You of all people know how fucked up I am and after what happened yesterday I guess I was due one. I haven't had one that bad for a long time though, not bad enough that it's made me sick anyway."

Shinji reached out and took hold of Asuka's hand and gently stroked along the back with his thumbs. He wished that he could feel her hands properly and not through the plugsuits like they would have done if they were back on the Wunder but the time for that had passed.

"Are you going to be alright to move us on today?"

Asuka looked out of the door to the Entry Plug, "I'll be fine. We'll just take it slow to start with I suppose."

Shinji gazed around the Entry Plug, "it's strange that we'll be doing this in an Eva, what happens if we come across a settlement. Won't they... be scared of it?"

"Maybe, I don't really know. We'll have to plan carefully if we detect anything. We're much safer in the Eva than anywhere else though. Especially with Nemesis Series out there or the Wunder finding us."

"It looks like they didn't come back for us last night."

Asuka shrugged, "Yeah, maybe they got recalled somewhere or whatever, it doesn't matter why let's just be glad it happened. I think the first thing we need to do is figure out where we are."

"What about Misato's necklace, the tower? Are we going to do anything about that?"

"Not yet. Finding out where we are comes first, then we need to find a settlement and supplies. Anything else can be disregarded for now."

Ritsuko stood up straight at the head of the large table in the AAA Wunders meeting around. Seated around the table was the Wunders senior staff comprising of Maya, Kitakami, Takao, Nagara and Tama. Finalizing the group were the two former NERV bridge technicians Aoba and Hyuga.

There was a noticeable sense of tension within the air with none of the seated individuals daring to make eye contact with one another, instead choosing to keep their heads down. The two exceptions to this were Maya whose gaze was fixed on a screen situated behind Ritsuko and Takao who had his gaze locked on Ritsuko herself.

Ritsuko tried to ignore the gaze of the senior member of the Wunders bridge crew. She had anticipated such a reaction from him knowing that he was possibly the most loyal of the crew members to the former captain. She calmly placed her hand down on the table and started to speak.

“Good morning to you all and thank you for attending this meeting. As the most senior members of the Wunders Crew I believe you are all owed an explanation regarding exactly what happened yesterday and how are going to progress.”

As she spoke she could see a couple of them exchanging worried glances. Many of them were around for the events that had transpired last night but were clueless as to the circumstances.

“As you all know last night saw the unfortunate removal of Misato Katsuragi as captain of the AAA Wunder. I want you all to know this was not a decision that was taken lightly and one that was made not only by myself but also from the WILLE committee. It was felt that given her actions within the last twenty four hours her removal was unavoidable.”

Takao finally spoke up, his voice as gruff as always, “So what exactly did she do?”

“Isn’t it obvious? She let those two escape!” Tama retorted.

“Escape? We don’t have proof of th-“

“Enough!” Ritsuko held up her hand to interrupt the argument, “Unfortunately Takao the situation is that Katsuragi did indeed help Shikinami and Ikari escape with Unit 02.”

Takao was unable to hide the look of shock on his face, “W-Why?”

“Her motived for doing so are unclear at this moment in time. It is our belief however that Katsuragi might have been compromised emotionally. As you all know the Captain has been under a lot of stress lately, I’ve known Katsuragi a lot longer than all of you have and she has been prone to letting her emotions affect her judgement. In the past this has been beneficial but there will always be one time where things go a bit too far.”

The elder tech looked like he was about to say something else but he sat back in his seat listening to the rest of what Ritsuko had to say, “Katsuragi made no secret of her desire to destroy what was left of NERV even going to far as to say that this was the sole aim of WILLE at certain points. As you are all aware this is not true, our aim is to defend what is left of humanity not to partake in some revenge mission.”

Nagara looked up from her position, “What would prompt her to do this though? It seems a bit extreme.”

This time it was Maya who responded, “During yesterday’s mission things did not go exactly to plan. We feel that she was afraid that when the report of the mission got out she would lose her chance to continue her own personal crusade and put this into motion.”

Ritsuko nodded, “To elaborate on this point you each took part in the mission yesterday to recover the artefact. What you will not know is that during this mission we detected a number of anomalous readings within Pilot Shikinami. A call was made to have Shikinami sedated immediately and control of Evangelion Unit 02 transferred to Makinami.”

“What sort of readings?” Tama asked, a bit of fear in his voice.

“Spikes in blood pressure and brain activity. It was our belief that Shikinami was suffering some sort of panic attack within the cockpit. Makinami confirmed this by reporting erratic behavior from Shikinami. Of course we could not confirm it as we had lost visual but ultimately the call had to be made.”

Ritsuko paused for a brief moment, “That was a call that Katsuragi was highly reluctant to make. She was convinced to do this eventually and we did recover the artefact and Evangelion Unit 02. Katsuragi promptly left the bridge and was not seen or heard from again for a number of hours.”

“We got the artefact though didn’t we? So why did she help them escape? Hell why did she set that up?” Nagara asked.

“Despite the success of the mission we suffered damage to Evangelion Unit 02 and risked losing a pilot. Not only this but this sort of thing had been detected in Asuka in the past. We simply believe that Katsuragi feared that when the report of this got out that would be the end to her personal crusade. WILLEs committee was already contemplating recalling us to Neo-London and the surrounding settlements, especially with the resurgence of the Angels.”

Kitakami now spoke, “So in an act of desperation she set them loose.”

Ritsuko nodded, “Yes. Sometime after the return of Unit 02 Hyuga noticed someone was accessing a number of the Wunders internal security systems.”

Hyuga nodded in response, “When we first detected it we were unable to figure out exactly what was happening. They were accessing fairly routine things but over time we saw they were altering the security officer schedules and patrol routes. Of course by the time we figured that out it was already too late.”

“So she set it up so that Shikinami could grab the boy and the two of them escape in an Eva? That’s… madness! She’s insane!” Tama spoke up.

Ritsuko held up a hand to silence him, “That is unfortunately correct. We were too late to recover Asuka and Shinji before they escaped but we did manage to find Katsuragi who gave herself up promptly and admitted to what she had done. Now that we have the ‘what happened’ out of the way we move to what will happen next.”

Kitakami spoke up, “This leaves us without an Eva doesn’t it? What if there is an Angel? We got lucky last night but… that won’t happen again will it?”

Ritsuko frowned and shook her head, “We believe what happened last night was also the work of Katsuragi. It was little more than a decoy set up to allow Asuka and Shinji time to escape. You are correct that next time we hear the reports of an Angel it will likely not be a decoy. That is why we are now travelling back to Neo London. Once there we will take on board Evangelion Unit 08.”

Kitakami spoke again, “Unit 08? Isn’t that Mari’s Unit? Will she be willing to help us get them back?”

Ritsuko shook her head in reply, “As of now our priority is not the recovery of Evangelion Unit 02 and the pilots. We will instead be deployed on a patrol route of the European settlements instead. Evangelion Unit 08 will be deployed in case of an actual Angel attack.”

Tama spoke up, “With all due respect shouldn’t we be focusing on getting Unit 02 back?”

Ritsuko nodded, “Normally I would agree but those are our orders from the committee and I intend to stick to them. Now if you’ll excuse me I have to inform the pilots of Evangelion Unit 08 of their new duties.”

Like the others said maybe history is destine to repeat itself but I have a feeling that the kill shot may not come from Gendo but Maya because no one likes being led along, used and then tossed aside

Shinji Ikari sat looking upwards at the stars that had appeared across the night sky. It was the end of his and Asuka’s first full day on the run from the AAA Wunder. There had been no sign of the mighty vessel all day something both he and Asuka were glad about.

Neither he nor Asuka had spoken much during the course of the day. She had mostly been concentrating on putting more distance between them and the Wunder should it be looking for them. He had spent most of the day familiarising himself with the various controls within Evangelion Unit 02.

There weren’t too many new things for him to familiarise himself with. Despite the advances in Evangelion technology over the years the thing still handled the same as it always had done and his experience in Evangelion Unit 13 had given him some experience with the dual entry systems.

They had discovered that they were perhaps another day’s travel from an outpost. It was their hope that maybe there they could get some supplies and help to figure out where they were. There was of course the issue of what to do with Evangelion Unit 02 on arriving but Asuka had insisted they would be fine and that they would tackle that issue when it occurred.

When the night had started to come in Asuka had found another area with cliffs similar to where they had spent the first night. She had settled Unit 02 down into a lying position and ejected the Entry Plug a slight amount. Shinji now looked up, within time to think and reflect on all that had happened.

He looked down and saw Misato’s necklace in his hand. He had been wearing the item around his neck for most of the day, only taking it off when they stopped to rest. Asuka had been eying it curiously but said nothing about it. He wondered if maybe she thought it was stupid him being so transfixed on it. Maybe she thought he should have thrown it away. He expected that that is what Asuka would have done, especially after what had happened with Misato.
No matter what Shinji couldn’t find it within himself to be angry at Misato. He knew that what she had done was wrong and he could understand Asuka’s anger at the women. Yet Shinji was just glad to know that after everything Misato didn’t really blame him for what had happened and that he even loved him.

“You make sure you look after that.”

Shinji turned at the sound of Asuka’s voice. She was staring at him from the rear seat of the cockpit, her lips turned upwards into a smile.

“Huh?” He responded.

“The necklace you idiot, Misato wouldn’t be happy if we returned without it. Her father gave her it you know, and now she has passed it onto you. You know what that means right?”

Shinji shook his head, “N-No…”

“Did Misato ever tell you about her past?”

Shinji nodded, “A little bit but not much. I know that she was there in Antarctica when Second Impact happened, she was the only survivor but… she was always quiet about it. I know that… she didn’t like her father though. When I first met her she said it was something we had in common, that neither of us got along with our fathers.”

“True, Misato hated her father. Can’t really blame her, much like our fathers he neglected her in favour of something else. In my case it was other women and other daughters of his, in your case it was… being a… well a general asshole I guess.”

Shinji laughed, “Neglected in favour of building giant robots he’ll force me into, creating clones of my dead mother and trying to… take over the world I guess? Is that what he’s doing?”

Asuka gave a shrug and smiled back at him, “I don’t know but whatever it is… we’ll stop him. Anyway in Misato’s case her father was dedicated to his research and neglected her mother and her. They separated and Misato blamed him for it, said he could never work out his feelings for others. Always seemed closed off but he tried to make amends. Took her on the expedition to the Antarctic.”

“And then Second Impact happened…”

Asuka lowered her head, “Yeah… he saved her life. Took her to an evacuation pod and sealed her up inside. His last moments were to tell her he loved her and give her that necklace. That she would always be his daughter and that he was proud of her.”

“I see… and now I have it.”

“Misato said it contained the key to finding the Tower. I haven’t decided if we are going to do that yet but if that was all it was she could easily have given it to me or hidden it somewhere else. Misato gave it to you because she thinks of you as her family. She recognizes that she made similar mistakes to her father in how she treated you and this is… her thing I guess.”

Shinji glanced down at the necklace again before tightening his grip around it, “She thinks of me… as family.”

“She always used to annoy me with how she spoke about you to be honest. How you were like her son and crap like that but you should know that’s how she felt. That necklace was in her family a long time, she wanted to make sure it went into the hands of someone she considered family. That’s why she didn’t pass it to me”

“We’ll get it back to her… won’t we?”

Asuka nodded, “After we do what we need to yes. We will.”

“Are you still mad at her?”

“Furious.” She confirmed after a time before sitting down next to Shinji and also looking up at the stars with him, "Probably angrier at her than I was with you for the whole aborted Fourth Impact thing."

Shinji laughed, "And you were really angry at me as well... I deserved it though. I shouldn't have ran away from WILLE and I should have listened to the others... to Kaworu. I try to tell myself that his death wasn't really my fault. That my father planned it to be that way. He knew Kaworu would take the collar from me to gain my trust and he knew that I'd pull those spears and Kaworu would be revealed to be an Angel but I still... if I hadn't have pulled the spears."

Asuka quickly silenced Shinji with a kiss, she pulled back and smiled, "It doesn't matter anymore. It's done Shinji and we have to push on. Misato gave us the means to find the tower. We'll find it..."

Asuka saw his eyes light up at her words, "W-We're actually going to? I thought you..."

"I'm angry at Misato for what she did and a part of me wants to not bother just to spite her but I have to be smarter than that. Finding that tower was important to her and our mission to stop NERV. She believed that and Kaji believed that and I'm not going to go against that."

"Can we really find it though? I mean... I don't even know what it is."

Asuka took his hand in hers and kissed him once again, "Of course we can find it you idiot. After all I'm Asuka Langley Shikinami and you're Shinji Ikari. We're unstoppable."

Tama placed his tray on the table and looked down at the food within it with a look of dejection on his face.
"You know... for all I didn't really like the idea of the kid being on the ship he did a good job in the canteen. I'll miss his cooking at least, he had talent." He stabbed his fork into some of the dry meat on the tray, "Certainly better than this."

Overhearing him Aoba looked up from the magazine he was reading and glanced over at him, "He was a saviour to us all back in Tokyo-3."

"He helped in the canteen at NERV as well?"

"No we weren't quite that lucky but back then we used to go to one of the bridge crews apartments for dinner. Let's just say we dreaded visiting Katsuragi's until Shinji shown up and shown off his talent."

"Was Katsuragi that bad?" Nagara asked, intrigued by conversation.

Aoba nodded grimly, "Her method of cooking was to take instant stuff, smother it in more instant stuff and then pour various hot sauces on it. You wouldn't even feed it to a pet. When Shinji started living with her he insisted on doing all the cooking."

"It's hard to imagine her being that... irresponsible." Said Nagara

"She had her moments, like most of us she changed after the Near Third Impact. She had her moments still but losing Shinji and the world she knew.... it definitely changed more than most. You guys just didn't see that happen."

"Well we certainly saw one change happen." Tama said, "When we got Shinji back we all saw it and now it’s led to this. I still don't get it though, why did she get them to leave? Why would she leave us without an Evangelion and a trusted pilot?"

Aoba gave a shrug, "I don't know why she did that, I couldn't tell you why Katsuragi does many of the things she does but I can tell you one thing. Katsuragi was always driven by her instincts and in most cases... she was usually right."

XXX

"So... it's really true then... Shinji and Asuka aren't on board anymore?" Sakura asked, her head lowered and her hand reaching out to fiddle with one of the tiny plastic toys on her desk.

"Afraid so kid..." Takao confirmed to her before taking a sip from the cup of coffee in his hands.

Sakura couldn't quite believe it as she tightened her hand on the toy. She didn't want to believe the rumours she had heard since waking up that morning. Wanted to believe that maybe she had misheard people or that it was some weird joke. Yet Takao had confirmed it to her, her friends were no longer on board.

"And Katsuragi?"

"Confined to the brig until further notice. Akagi has taken over for now."

She could hear the distaste for what had happened in his voice. She had to admit she felt it herself. She had watched that mission yesterday and seen what had happened. She had been there when Asuka had returned and was immediately placed into quarantine without even being looked at. She found it so hard to believe that not even a day later Asuka was gone. All she could do was shake her head, "Why... did this happen?"

Takao set his cup down and shrugged, "I don't know. We can guess but that isn't going to get us anywhere. All I know is that Katsuragi did something yesterday, it set those two free and now Akagi is in charge and she's keeping something from us."

Takao’s frown deepened, "Something is going on here... this isn't something that just happens. First that kid returns and NERV show themselves... then we get him back and it leads to this. I don't know Katsuragi much but I knew Kaji, he always believed in her."

Sakura looked up and also frowned, "I've not known Katsuragi for long but Touji and Hikari always used to tell me about her from what they learned from Shinji and Asuka. She sounded insane back in those days, devising a plan to catch an Angel falling from orbit or using all of the power in Japan but they worked... she wouldn't... turn on us... she had to have a reason to do what she did... right?"

"I think so... Things were hard for her since the kid returned. They were hard for all of us, kid just returns like that and everything changes. Half the crew thought he should have been shot on sight and the other half thought they should give him a second chance. They had to have been hard for her though, can't just shut things off like that..."

"I thought things would get better when he came back with Asuka... that maybe they could resolve everything… people said I was stupid to believe that. With everything that’s happened I’m beginning to wonder… was I naïve and stupid like they said? Was it wrong for me to believe things could get better?”

Takao rose from his seat and wandered over to Takao, he placed a comforting hand down on her shoulder and shook his head, “You weren’t wrong and you’re certainly not stupid to have believed that. We need to keep on believing that even when others won’t. Katsuragi… she won’t have sent them out without good reason. She knew what she was doing and we just have to trust that she was right.”

“Yeah… I suppose you’re right.”

Nice to see Sakura again

Shinji was struggling to keep his eyes open as Unit 02 continued it's journey. They were currently progressing through what appeared to be an old town. A number of buildings about as high as Unit 02s waist were still standing, their windows shattered long ago. Abandoned vehicles littered the roads and in front of a few of the old shops items could be seen scattered, no doubt left behind by looters from the time the town was left behind.

A thick layer of red covered most of the streets. At some points it formed a strange sort of skin, sticking to the sides of the vehicles and almost claiming what was left on the pavements as its own. Unit 02 strode through the streets, Asuka doing what she could to avoid the vehicles but every now and them having to effortlessly kick them to the side or walk on top of them.

Shinji let out a yawn as Asuka pushed the machine on. She turned around to him and glared in annoyance, "That's about the fifteenth time you've yawned in as many minutes!"

"I know... I'm sorry." He started, "We didn't get much sleep last night."

Asuka grinned recalling how pleasant the previous night had been for the both of them, "I know, I was very much a part of it too remember."

Shinji blushed and nodded, "Y-Yeah... thank you."

"Shinji, please don't thank me for having sex with you. It doesn't sound right. It's not like I was doing you a favour, I wanted to do it and you were as much a participant as I am."

"I-Sorry... I just..." Shinji yawned again as he spoke.

"God you're annoying, you're lucky that I love you." She shot him a smile as she continued moving Unit 02 forward down another street this time having to climb over a coach that had been turned onto its side, "Why don't you go and get some sleep for a couple of hours. Not like anything is happening here."

Shinji shook his head, "No... I'll be fine besides I don't want to leave you alone."

"Then pack it in with the yawning!"

Shinji nodded, "I'll try..."

He said immediately yawning afterwards, he instantly apologized, "Sorry..."

"God damnit, I swear you're doing it on purpose! How about this... if you yawn one more time, that thing I did last night with my ton-"

As Asuka was speaking Shinji's eye was caught by a flashing red marker on the radar screen in front of him. He cut Asuka off, "Um Asuka... there's... something approaching us I think..."

"..won't be happening again nor will I allow you to do that thing wh- wait what?"

Asuka immediately turned her attention back to what was in front of her, she halted Evangelion Unit 02 and looked around, "Something approaching? I need more details Shinji, where is it?"

Shinji looked at the radar screen again observing the red dot, a few more had now appeared, "Umm.. At two o clock? And they are about.... they're on the edge of the map."

"They?" She asked, her tone no longer playful.

"I'm seeing about four or five of them. Can you see anything out there?"

Asuka shifted Unit 02 around to look in the direction Shinji had given and strained her eyes. All she was able to see was the maze of streets that made up this old abandoned town. Whatever it was that was approaching was most likely amongst the streets themselves which would make spotting it difficult.

Asuka felt herself tense up as she started to frantically scan the area looking for any sign of the approaching unknowns. Her mind instantly recalled what had happened the last time she was within a town such as this.
"S-Shinji... what's happening?" She asked, her voice suddenly more shaky than it had been before.

Shinji shook his head as he looked at the radar again, "I don't know... they're not moving they're just... there."

"I need more information Shinji! Is it Nemesis Series? NERV? Anything, does it tell you anything at all?"

"I-I know that but this isn't giving me anything. I'm not picking up at A.T. Fields or anything they're just... red blips."

"We need more... need to get higher. Can see the streets better." Asuka looked around for the tallest building near to their position. Her stomach felt heavy as she reached up to start climbing the building

'Damnit why am I feeling like this, why am I remembering that now of all times. Everything is going to be fine, I have Shinji in here with me, nothing bad can happen. Nothing bad is going to happen to us, we're just going to climb up here and see what is there and it'll probably be nothing.'

"A-Asuka are you okay?" She heard Shinji ask, slowly she came to her senses and realized she had been stood looking up at the building for some time.

'I.. I froze in front of Shinji. I can't... I can't do this... I need to stay focuses. I'm not going to let him get hurt!'

She looked up again and started to climb.