Favorite crazy Evangelion theories

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Postby Bagheera » Wed Aug 12, 2015 1:18 pm

View Original PostArcadia's legacy wrote:The sequel/time loop theory (shudders)


Yeah, that one generated all sorts of dumb, and some of it just refuses to die.
For my post-3I fic, go here.
The law doesn't protect people. People protect the law. -- Akane Tsunemori, Psycho-Pass
People's deaths are to be mourned. The ability to save people should be celebrated. Life itself should be exalted. -- Volken Macmani, Tatakau Shisho: The Book of Bantorra
I hate myself. But maybe I can learn to love myself. Maybe it's okay for me to be here! That's right! I'm me, nothing more, nothing less! I'm me. I want to be me! I want to be here! And it's okay for me to be here! -- Shinji Ikari, Neon Genesis Evangelion
Yes, I know. You thought it would be something about Asuka. You're such idiots.

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Postby Nuclear Lunchbox » Wed Aug 12, 2015 1:37 pm

It's easy for it to stick around since the movies aren't over, though. For however foolish or idiotic it may seem, there's always the tiniest glimmer of possibility to some that Shin will prove sequel theory once and for all.

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Postby UrsusArctos » Wed Aug 12, 2015 6:43 pm

A groundhog day loop seems far more plausible than this being some kind of straightforward sequel. Having all the Rebuild movies turn out to be a sequel to End of Evangelion would really kill the impact (pun intended)

View Original PostReichu wrote:What do you have against a version of Kaworu that's female with male secondary sexual characteristics? What did she ever do to you?


Fem-Kaworu won't be able to hook up with Rei and make babies, that's why! :kaos_akuma:
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Postby Sailor Star Dust » Wed Aug 12, 2015 7:00 pm

Yes, yesss! KawoRei 5 ever :heart:
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Postby Reichu » Wed Aug 12, 2015 7:32 pm

View Original PostUrsusArctos wrote:Fem-Kaworu won't be able to hook up with Rei and make babies, that's why! :kaos_akuma:

There's a fair chance that Kaworu and Rei are both sterile anyway, so no real loss. :tongue:

Some more dumb conclusions. Prepare your rage machines.

  • Eva 2.0's finale was not terrifying or foreboding in any way whatsoever. LRS 4ever!
  • LRS is not incest. If it is, fanwank as much of Yui's genes out of Rei as possible, because incest is gross, maybe even worse than pedophilia. There's no kink to be found there, for sure!
  • Rei's falling body parts doom post-3I Earth.
  • Asuka doesn't return of her own accord. She returns because Shinji wanted her to.
  • Asuka was disemboweled and eaten by the MP Evas.
  • Anno is a troll. His sole motivation for making creative decisions is to piss off his audience as much as possible.
  • The Katsuragi Team putting Adam in contact with human genes had absolutely nothing to do with Kaworu's origins.
  • The definition of "fanwanking" is "anything I disagree with".

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Postby BlueBasilisk » Wed Aug 12, 2015 7:59 pm

3.0 retcons 2.0 and isn't in the spirit of Evangelion.

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Postby Nuclear Lunchbox » Wed Aug 12, 2015 8:03 pm

View Original PostUrsusArctos wrote:A groundhog day loop seems far more plausible than this being some kind of straightforward sequel. Having all the Rebuild movies turn out to be a sequel to End of Evangelion would really kill the impact (pun intended)

I can't deny that it might be interesting to see the new films as the way Shinji re-imagined the world, only to have it all go to shit again. /fanwank

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Postby Bagheera » Wed Aug 12, 2015 8:12 pm

Oh yeah, that reminds me: Shinji got superpowers 'cause of Instrumentality. Dumbest idea ever, and fanfic writers love it. Also, the notion that because Rei might have transcended time and space it therefore follows that she can somehow reset time or give Shinji a do-over. Because that's totally something a terraforming engine would need to be able to do, amirite?
For my post-3I fic, go here.
The law doesn't protect people. People protect the law. -- Akane Tsunemori, Psycho-Pass
People's deaths are to be mourned. The ability to save people should be celebrated. Life itself should be exalted. -- Volken Macmani, Tatakau Shisho: The Book of Bantorra
I hate myself. But maybe I can learn to love myself. Maybe it's okay for me to be here! That's right! I'm me, nothing more, nothing less! I'm me. I want to be me! I want to be here! And it's okay for me to be here! -- Shinji Ikari, Neon Genesis Evangelion
Yes, I know. You thought it would be something about Asuka. You're such idiots.

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Postby EvangelionGodMode » Wed Aug 12, 2015 8:50 pm

View Original PostReichu wrote:There's a fair chance that Kaworu and Rei are both sterile anyway, so no real loss. :tongue:

Some more dumb conclusions. Prepare your rage machines.

  • Eva 2.0's finale was not terrifying or foreboding in any way whatsoever. LRS 4ever!
  • LRS is not incest. If it is, fanwank as much of Yui's genes out of Rei as possible, because incest is gross, maybe even worse than pedophilia. There's no kink to be found there, for sure!
  • Rei's falling body parts doom post-3I Earth.
  • Asuka doesn't return of her own accord. She returns because Shinji wanted her to.
  • Asuka was disemboweled and eaten by the MP Evas.
  • Anno is a troll. His sole motivation for making creative decisions is to piss off his audience as much as possible.
  • The Katsuragi Team putting Adam in contact with human genes had absolutely nothing to do with Kaworu's origins.
  • The definition of "fanwanking" is "anything I disagree with".




I support Shinji bringing Asuka back theory, because it makes more sense bc she was already dead before being sucked into lilith's egg, so she was probably recreated by god Shinji and made less of a bitch lol.
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Postby Bagheera » Wed Aug 12, 2015 8:55 pm

View Original PostEvangelionGodMode wrote:I support Shinji bringing Asuka back theory, because it makes more sense bc she was already dead before being sucked into lilith's egg, so she was probably recreated by god Shinji and made less of a bitch lol.


That makes no sense at all. Did you even watch EoE?
For my post-3I fic, go here.
The law doesn't protect people. People protect the law. -- Akane Tsunemori, Psycho-Pass
People's deaths are to be mourned. The ability to save people should be celebrated. Life itself should be exalted. -- Volken Macmani, Tatakau Shisho: The Book of Bantorra
I hate myself. But maybe I can learn to love myself. Maybe it's okay for me to be here! That's right! I'm me, nothing more, nothing less! I'm me. I want to be me! I want to be here! And it's okay for me to be here! -- Shinji Ikari, Neon Genesis Evangelion
Yes, I know. You thought it would be something about Asuka. You're such idiots.

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Postby EvangelionGodMode » Wed Aug 12, 2015 8:57 pm

How does it make no sense?
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To put it in laid man terms, hes getting laid man.-Blake, Workaholics.
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Postby Bagheera » Wed Aug 12, 2015 9:01 pm

View Original PostEvangelionGodMode wrote:How does it make no sense?


Because there's no such thing as "god Shinji" and because Rei and Kaworu clearly explained how things worked and what you said is nonsensical in light of that.
For my post-3I fic, go here.
The law doesn't protect people. People protect the law. -- Akane Tsunemori, Psycho-Pass
People's deaths are to be mourned. The ability to save people should be celebrated. Life itself should be exalted. -- Volken Macmani, Tatakau Shisho: The Book of Bantorra
I hate myself. But maybe I can learn to love myself. Maybe it's okay for me to be here! That's right! I'm me, nothing more, nothing less! I'm me. I want to be me! I want to be here! And it's okay for me to be here! -- Shinji Ikari, Neon Genesis Evangelion
Yes, I know. You thought it would be something about Asuka. You're such idiots.

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Postby Ash1969 » Wed Aug 12, 2015 9:02 pm

View Original PostReichu wrote:There's a fair chance that Kaworu and Rei are both sterile anyway, so no real loss. :tongue:

Some more dumb conclusions. Prepare your rage machines.

  • Eva 2.0's finale was not terrifying or foreboding in any way whatsoever. LRS 4ever!
  • LRS is not incest. If it is, fanwank as much of Yui's genes out of Rei as possible, because incest is gross, maybe even worse than pedophilia. There's no kink to be found there, for sure!
  • Rei's falling body parts doom post-3I Earth.
  • Asuka doesn't return of her own accord. She returns because Shinji wanted her to.
  • Asuka was disemboweled and eaten by the MP Evas.
  • Anno is a troll. His sole motivation for making creative decisions is to piss off his audience as much as possible.
  • The Katsuragi Team putting Adam in contact with human genes had absolutely nothing to do with Kaworu's origins.
  • The definition of "fanwanking" is "anything I disagree with".

I agree with all your other points but the one I bolded confused me. Asuka may not have been physically effected when the MP Evas "disemboweled" Kyoko, but she obviously felt it. I fail to see how this would be a dumb conclusion for someone to make.
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Postby EvangelionGodMode » Wed Aug 12, 2015 9:04 pm

Ok how did her soul get sucked into Lillith's egg if she was already dead? And Shinji got the power to get his desires granted so he probably used the power to bring Asuka back bc he saw her die.
Bong. James Bong. Bruce lee the way I kick it, Tiger Woods the way I hit it.-Blake ,Workaholics.
To put it in laid man terms, hes getting laid man.-Blake, Workaholics.
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Postby BlueBasilisk » Wed Aug 12, 2015 9:07 pm

I always assumed that was the case because we see Unit 02's chest torn open as well as its bare spine with no signs of the entry plug. She could have maybe ejected after the Eva 'died' but we're never shown one way or the other.

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Postby Ash1969 » Wed Aug 12, 2015 9:14 pm

View Original PostEvangelionGodMode wrote:Ok how did her soul get sucked into Lillith's egg if she was already dead? And Shinji got the power to get his desires granted so he probably used the power to bring Asuka back bc he saw her die.

You just answered your own question. If she and Misato only got sucked in thanks to Shinji then why did Ritsuko show up in the P3II?
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Postby Reichu » Wed Aug 12, 2015 9:15 pm

View Original PostAsh1969 wrote:Asuka may not have been physically effected when the MP Evas "disemboweled" Kyoko, but she obviously felt it. I fail to see how this would be a dumb conclusion for someone to make.

It doesn't happen. Asuka isn't disemboweled and Asuka isn't eaten. That would be her mom the Eva. Hence, it's a dumb conclusion.

I'm not sure many people actually believe it happened to Asuka, versus her fans resorting to hyperbole in a misguided attempt to appeal to the emotions of others. Dumb in its own way.

"Asuka had her guts ripped out! She got eaten! She got strangled twice! Feel sorry for her!"
"Uhh, only one of those things actually happened..."

(Obviously Shinji didn't actually strangle her the first time it was shown, since Asuka was lying dead in pieces somewhere and Shinji was a puddle in his mom's spine. It was a visual metaphor. METAPHOR!)

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Postby Bagheera » Wed Aug 12, 2015 9:15 pm

View Original PostEvangelionGodMode wrote:Ok how did her soul get sucked into Lillith's egg if she was already dead?


Why would it not? We know Misato's, Ritsuko's, and all of those of the Nerv techs and the JSSDF soldiers were included, so why not Asuka? The notion that she wouldn't be is dumb as hell.

And Shinji got the power to get his desires granted so he probably used the power to bring Asuka back bc he saw her die.


Bullshit. Again, dumb as hell. Shinji didn't get any power whatsoever, this is obvious to anyone watching EoE. Rei asks Shinji what he wants her to do, and she does it. Shinji himself never does jack shit. This notion that Shinji got superpowers needs to die in a fire, because there's absolutely nothing in the text to support it.
For my post-3I fic, go here.
The law doesn't protect people. People protect the law. -- Akane Tsunemori, Psycho-Pass
People's deaths are to be mourned. The ability to save people should be celebrated. Life itself should be exalted. -- Volken Macmani, Tatakau Shisho: The Book of Bantorra
I hate myself. But maybe I can learn to love myself. Maybe it's okay for me to be here! That's right! I'm me, nothing more, nothing less! I'm me. I want to be me! I want to be here! And it's okay for me to be here! -- Shinji Ikari, Neon Genesis Evangelion
Yes, I know. You thought it would be something about Asuka. You're such idiots.

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Postby EvangelionGodMode » Wed Aug 12, 2015 9:17 pm

Shinji didn't bring anybody in lilith's egg, Rei did that. What i don't understand is how Misato and Asuka both were in instrumentality if Shinji wasn't a god and didn't bring them back on his own free choice. And im not saying Shinji has superpowers but Rei was a god and he was given the decision to end the world so he was pretty much in control for a little bit of time.
Bong. James Bong. Bruce lee the way I kick it, Tiger Woods the way I hit it.-Blake ,Workaholics.
To put it in laid man terms, hes getting laid man.-Blake, Workaholics.
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Postby BlueBasilisk » Wed Aug 12, 2015 9:20 pm

You just said it. Rei collected their souls for Instrumentality with Lilith's power. Shinji had nothing to do with that. Rei let him decide what she was going to do but she did all the legwork herself.


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