My friends, it has often been said that I like posts.
Friends, I like posts.
No, friends, I love posts!
I love one-shots. I love stories. I love dialogue. I love fight scenes, love scenes, I love the abstract, and the precise.
Posts across message boards, in forums, in chat rooms, in MSN, in Skype, through PMs, on the internet, in text messages, I love every type of post that can occur upon this earth.
I love blasting ships to smithereens with devastating updates that thunder across lines of text.
My heart leaps with joy whenever a character is tossed into the air and cut to pieces by some RPer's competing post.
And there is nothing like a RPer using an epic move to destroy enemy NPCs. And the feeling that comes when a character runs screaming from his stupid move only to be mowed down by derisive quips from his fellows, is such an exquisite feeling.
Like when a person who doesn't RP is rushing in to read every line. It moves me deep within my heart to see a fresh RPer's opening post and watch them edit it over and over.
The sight of RPers being pestered to post is an irresistible pleasure. And there is nothing more arousing, than the sounds made by players typing furiously, screaming in agony as they try to meet their own stupid deadline!
When a band of pitiful characters makes their first go with nothing but Level 1 gear, only to have their party smashed to atoms by high level monsters, I'm in ecstasy.
I love it when my plots are ravaged by a well made response post. It's so sad to see plot points that were supposed to be enacted at all costs, being laid to waste, their characters and items being ruined and killed.
I love to be rushed under the heel of the Annoying and Persistant RPers. The humiliation, as my characters are treated like vermin, ducking the flying plot points other people come up with.
Gentlemen... All I ask for is posts, a post so grand as to make the forum itself tremble. Gentlemen, I ask you as fellow brothers in RP, what is it you really want? Do you wish for further posts as I do? Do you wish for a merciless, bloody post? A post whose fury is built with iron, and lightning, and fire? Do you ask for post to sweep in like a tempest, leaving not even ravens to scavenge, from this Earth!?
Very well. Then post is what you shall have. We are a united front, ready to strike down all who oppose us, with our posts. But... After enduring over ten days wallowing in the darkness, for us, a simple "ordinary" post will no longer be sufficient. We need a MASSIVE post! A post beyond any other that man's history has ever known!
We are but a single RP... The remnants of a Fandom numbering less than a dozen strong. However, I believe that each of you old RPers is worth a thousand of their sickly soft noobs! We represent a force that could easily defeat an RP of a million and one men! It is time for us to awake the ones who sent us screaming into oblivion, and who now lie sleeping. Let's drag them out of bed by the hair, and remind them of what we are! We will remind them of what it feels like to live in expectation of new posts. We will remind them of the sound our keyboards make against their forum. We will remind them, that there are more things between Heaven and Hell than are dreamt of in their philosophy.
Our RP of nine battle-hardened warriors will burn this world down to ash. Yes, my friends! Soon, Evageeks's charred remains will illuminate the internet! I have brought you all back just as I promised I would. Back to our favorite forum. Back to our beloved posts!
At last, the RP has crossed the Year mark and is heading up the page count! Attention RPers of the WANT RP, this is a message from your GM:
Friends... let's bring them Posts.