[CYOA] Rei Ayanami

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esselfortium
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Postby esselfortium » Sun Sep 06, 2009 1:01 pm

3! Your martial arts skills will be of greater use (and much more entertaining) if you're wearing Groucho Marx glasses while doing so.

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Postby Smothmoth » Sun Sep 06, 2009 1:10 pm

Choice three, buy a horse costume and make Shinji be the rear. Then knock out Kiel using your martial arts skills, in the horse costume.

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Postby esselfortium » Sun Sep 06, 2009 1:14 pm

Smothmoth wrote:horse costume

esselfortium wrote:Groucho Marx glasses

It should perhaps be noted that these two ideas are not incompatible; Commander Horse must be disguised as well

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Postby Sailor Star Dust » Sun Sep 06, 2009 1:20 pm

I say number 2! ^_^

And yay, glad I could help you with some of this in IRC sometime back. :3
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Postby NemZ » Sun Sep 06, 2009 6:57 pm

1 sounds the most Rei-like, but I'm going with 3 for the lulz. Scoobie-do logic is now in effect.
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Postby Teague » Sun Sep 06, 2009 8:54 pm

3. and get one for Shinji too!
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Postby Dranzer » Mon Sep 07, 2009 2:19 pm

3 and get a horse head for Ikari-kun,tooooo! :boingy:
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Postby Legendary » Tue Sep 08, 2009 12:36 am

Definitely three.

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Postby Lucretius » Sat Sep 12, 2009 6:10 pm

You decide it would be most prudent to purchases disguises at a costume shop before attempting to rescue Special Inspector Kaji. You turn to Ikari-kun.

“Ikari-kun, I once saw a television show concerning a group of teenagers who would solve mysteries by exposing seemingly otherworldly creatures as ordinary humans. They were also accompanied by a member of the species canis familiaris who had the ability to speak. In situations like this, the teenagers would purchase a variety of comical disguises in order to trick their antagonists. Perhaps we should do so as well.”

“Um…sure, Ayanami,” says Ikari-kun. You hear him murmur “Kaji-san,” under his breath, in a tone that suggests euphoria. You take Ikari-kun’s arm and proceed to the local costume shop, located next door to Casket World. Ikari-kun sways slightly as he walks.

You enter the costume shop with Ikari-kun in tow. There are a variety of strange garments therein. “Do people enjoy wearing costumes?” you ask Ikari-kun, puzzled.

“Um…I guess they do, yeah.”

“Why?”

“Um…well…I guess they like pretending to be things they aren’t.”

“I see.”

You notice a horse costume hanging on the opposite wall, and instantly become infatuated with it. “Ikari-kun, we must purchase the horse costume at once,” you say, eyes wide. “It is perfect for our purposes.”

Ikari-kun smiles nervously. “I-I’m not sure that’s such a good idea, Ayanami,” he says.

Your face takes on a crestfallen expression. Ikari-kun looks at you pityingly.

“I mean…sure, we can wear the horse costume, Ayanami!” he says hastily.

You smile slightly. “Thank you, Ikari-kun. No one will ever suspect a horse, so it is the perfect disguise.”

You see a stack of novelty glasses nearby. Bushy mustaches and plastic noses are attached to them. You pull one off of the stack, staring at it earnestly.

“We must purchase these as well. No one would suspect a horse of possessing guile, so a horse costume is the most logical choice. Therefore, a horse wearing comical glasses would be yet more appropriate, as no one would expect a glasses-wearing horses to hinder their plans.”

Ikari-kun opens his mouth as if to say something, but then turns his gaze upon the floor, sighing.

“Okay, Ayanami.”

You purchase both the horse costume and the glasses, pleased by the ingenuity of your idea. You place the glasses upon the horse's head. Upon leaving the store, you tell Ikari-kun “I shall be the head and upper body of the horse. You may be the rear.”

Ikari-kun nods, sighing again. The structure of the horse costume allows you to remain upright; however, Ikari-kun is forced to remain stooped over, grabbing onto your waist for balance. This evidently causes him great discomfort. He stutters various monosyllables as you proceed to the ramen stand; you feel something poking you, but choose to ignore it. Upon arriving, you decide to:

1) Walk through the door in your horse costume
2) Use your kung fu skills to disable Kiel
3) Prance around in your horse costume and ignore Kaji
Last edited by Lucretius on Sat Sep 12, 2009 6:36 pm, edited 1 time in total.

He shuddered a bit, remembering the somewhat creepy level of detail Kaji had gone into, while rubbing a watermelon in a disturbingly sexual way.

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Postby Great Genius Shinji-Sama » Sat Sep 12, 2009 6:24 pm

3 please. :shinji_blush: :rei_blush: :tentacles:
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Postby Sailor Star Dust » Sat Sep 12, 2009 6:34 pm

2. A horse using kung-fu is EPIC!!!!

I wonder if Commander Horse in Rei's backpack/at home feels neglected that Rei has a horse costume now.... >_>;
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Postby Teague » Sat Sep 12, 2009 6:47 pm

2, 2, gods be damned, my life requires you to pick two!
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Postby Sammaeloo » Sat Sep 12, 2009 6:48 pm

2, Shinji will be in the back end though, so he won't be able to see the horse suit kickassery for himself. Poor Shinji....
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Postby Great Genius Shinji-Sama » Sat Sep 12, 2009 6:50 pm

I change my vote to 2. With being in the back of Rei he will be able to see her skirt fly up and lookt at her panties. :shinji_blush: :rei_blush:
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Postby NemZ » Sat Sep 12, 2009 8:24 pm

3 is amusing, but #2 is made of pure, unrefined win. This should be an episode of excel saga.
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Postby esselfortium » Sat Sep 12, 2009 9:07 pm

2 is the only option.

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Postby Tequila » Sat Sep 12, 2009 9:35 pm

It's Time for some Horse-Style Kung Fu!!

The shear irony of this entire thing never ceases to have me rolling in fits
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Postby Dranzer » Sun Sep 13, 2009 1:35 am

Horse Kung Fu!!Kiel will be pleased :pwnd:
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Postby trueno_twentyone » Sun Sep 13, 2009 10:29 am

esselfortium wrote:2 is the only option.


This would make it as "Kung-Fu Rei Horsie"
Last edited by trueno_twentyone on Mon Sep 14, 2009 7:19 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby Dirty Mick » Sun Sep 13, 2009 7:50 pm

No. 2, Horse Kung Fu for you.


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