Here's an excerpt.
The sun had turned the sky a furious orange by the time Shinji got home from school. The elevator was slow and smooth. Whoever did maintenance on it apparently didn't care that very few people used it and still did a good of keeping it up. He swiped his key on the lock automatically. The first time he had crossed this door he'd hesitated. He'd never had a homeâ€”yes, he'd lived with relatives but it was hardly homeâ€”and here was this kind stranger, a pretty dark-haired woman, offering her home to him; he couldn't refuse but that didn't mean he couldn't have doubts about sharing such intimacy with someone he hardly knew.
Shinji removed his shoes at the entrance, throwing down his book bag next to them. The apartment's layout was simple enough, a kitchen just inside the door with an adjacent bathroom, a large living room which led immediately to the master bedroom and the terrace, and down a short corridor to the second bedroom and a closet. When he'd first moved in he'd taken the smaller room, but when Asuka had arrived he'd been moved to the closet across the hall. He hadn't complainedâ€”he didn't own that much stuff and Asuka owned piles. She needed the space more than he did. He could have moved back, certainly; Asuka had been in the hospital for ages and was not likely to return.
â€œI'm home, Misato,â€ he called as he entered the kitchen, not expecting her to be there.
The untidy wooden table and chairs made navigating the cramped space tricky. As he came around, Shinji frowned at the sight of a girl's school uniform neatly hanging from the back of one of the chairs.
Carefully, he picked up the thin bit of red ribbon the girls wore tied around the collars of their shirts from where it had been set and examined it. Why was this here? Had Misato decided to clear Asuka's stuff? No. The uniform was clean, freshly pressedâ€”not the sort of thing that would have been hanging in a closet gathering dust for months.
â€œI wanted to tell you.â€
Shinji looked up and saw Misato standing under the doorway leading to the rest of the apartment. Her dark eyes looked him over then dropped to the uniform. She seemed tired; her expression was one of concern. â€œAsuka is being released in a few days.â€
â€œReally?â€ Shinji could not fight the smile that crept over his features. â€œIs she cured?â€ he asked eagerly. â€œIs she doing okay?â€
â€œShe's ... better.â€ Misato did not look at him. â€œI thought maybe you would like to come with me to the hospital when I get her. I know she'd appreciate it.â€
â€œSure,â€ Shinji said, but Misato's strangely evasive gaze finally got his attention. Whenever they got a chance to talk she always seemed happy to see him, even if she wasn't feeling particularly upbeat; she always made an effort so the few moments they spent together were enjoyable. She would at least look at him. â€œMisato? Is there something wrong? With Asuka?â€
Misato sighed, leaning heavily against the door frame. â€œNot with Asuka. It's ... â€ Her face became hard, determined, and she took a deep breath. â€œThere's no easy way for me to say this so I'll just say it: I need you to pilot Eva again.â€
Shinji let the ribbon slip from his hand.
Misato quickly added, â€œI know I promised you wouldn't have to, but the Commander thinks there are more Angels on the way so we have to be ready.â€
â€œBut you promised.â€ Anger came suddenly over him, strong and unwelcome. It was like a burning wave that washed over him, a rush of emotion that swallowed everything in its path. â€œYou promised!â€
Misato shook her head. â€œI know I did, Shinji. Believe me. If there were anything else I could do--â€
â€œI know. I'm sorry.â€ Misatoâ€™s voice was soft. â€œIâ€™m sorry.â€
â€œThatâ€™s not good enough!â€ The words were out almost as soon as Shinji had thought them. Somewhere in the back of his mind there was a whisper of restraint, that part of him that felt he owed Misato the chance to explain. He ignored it. â€œEvery time I get on that thing someone gets hurt! Toji. Rei. Asuka. And â€¦ Kaoru. Every time! How can you ask me to go back? Donâ€™t you understand what it feels like? Donâ€™t you? Being sorry is not good enough! That doesnâ€™t make it better. It doesnâ€™t take the pain away. You are not the one that has to deal with it!â€
â€œShinji, Iâ€™ve tried to understandâ€”I really haveâ€”but your fatherâ€”this is his order.â€
â€œHe canâ€™t make me!â€ Shinji bellowed. â€œAnd neither can you. I donâ€™t care if you have orders. You're a monster just like my father!â€
As that last accusation left his lips he knew he had just crossed a line in the sand. It was a horrible thing to say, especially to someone who moments before he had been convinced cared about him.
Her widening eyes shimmered on the verge of tears and she was taken aback. In his anger he was glad that he could hurt her so deeply merely with words.
â€œYou are right,â€ Misato tried to keep her voice from quivering, succeeding only just barely, â€œI canâ€™t make you. But you are a man. And some times men have to do things they donâ€™t like because they are the right things, because people depend on them. Your choices affect more than just you. Your wordsâ€”â€ she stopped and for a moment seemed unable to gather her thoughts â€œâ€”Shinji, I donâ€™t want to hurt you. Iâ€™m not â€¦â€
But Shinji was not listening anymore.
â€œYou are a monster!â€
That was the end and Misato recognized it. Nothing she could say would change his mind and she knew it. No matter how she tried to justify her breaking her promise, he would not accept it. He would not pilot Eva again. Visibly deflated, she just nodded and swallowed further argument.
Shinji didnâ€™t watch her retreat, instead picking the little ribbon off the floor and dropping, exhausted and betrayed, on the nearest chair, laying his head into his hands.