I also don't think Arael did any raping in the entirety of this scene. The way Arael did things was surprisingly... I don't want to say 'fair', but something like "lawyer-esque." He was just presenting evidence to Asuka which she was previously in denial of. She had previously been telling herself that she was an adult who has no need for a mother, so Arael masqueraded as Kyoko and made her admit that it was an act and she really was still a child.
Next Arael moves on to Asuka's relationship with others. That's the "I can live on my own!" scene.
When Asuka says that she's been defiled, I don't think the angel is the guilty party. It just reminded her of something she had been denying.
This a bit weird because mind rape is not a real thing but I think most people would agree that lines like these would make "mind rape" an accurate description of what happen to Asuka, especially in light of how Rei dies. Angels like to rape apparently or at least don't get that it's fucked up:
"don't look inside my mind"
"stop it! stop it already!"
And then being forced to experience a proto-insturmentlity like experience where she is depicted as naked afterwards.
Then say "Iv'e been defiled" and cries.
Also this just crossed my mind. This Idea that Anno would be extremely subtle because he wouldn't be able to show it. I get that for the show but why wouldn't it be mentioned in the movie where we see a kid jerk off to a naked girl and make out with an older woman plus tons of scenes/shots with naked people in sex positions involving Shinji? Like it's strange that we wouldn't get explicit mention of it at all, or atleast lines about it like lines about Misato x Shinji, considering everything else that is bought up. If Asuka wasn't so central to that movie I could buy it maybe but given how important that relationship is it just seems very weird if it were the case.