Hand Cannot Erase/You Must (Not) Run Away | Post 3.33 Fics

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Hand Cannot Erase/You Must (Not) Run Away | Post 3.33 Fics

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Postby jcmoorehead » Thu Oct 20, 2016 5:19 pm

Hey everyone, so I pretty much have these up everywhere else now and I can't keep putting off making a thread on here. So I've wrote quite a quantity of Eva fics now, all of them can be seen by going to my FFN Profile but I thought I'd make a thread for my current work which is a Post 3.33 fic.

So a bit of background I guess. Originally I had no interest in doing a Post 3.33 fic, I kinda wanted to wait until the final film before doing a fic in that universe but a person who reviewed one of my fics on FFN mentioned I should give it a go and I started to get a few ideas, that was the birth of Hand.Cannot.Erase. Originally it was just supposed to be a short piece chronicling the journey back to the Wunder for our three pilots.

Sometime after writing it though I started to get the idea for a sequel, again a few people who reviewed it said they'd like to see one and I got the ideas and that was how You Must (Not) Run Away got started. So here they are, go, enjoy, leave reviews and stuff.

After the world narrowly escaped a 4th Impact, Shinji Ikari is broken. Asuka Shikinami must take charge and lead both him and the confused 'Rei Ayanami' across a vast wasteland to the place the Lilin can get them.

Hand.Cannot.Erase Table Of Contents
Hand.Cannot.Erase [First Regret - 14 Years Older]
Hand.Cannot.Erase [Regret No. 9]
Hand.Cannot.Erase [Keep Talking]
Hand.Cannot.Erase [Wearing The Inside Out]
Hand.Cannot.Erase [Ancestral]
Hand.Cannot.Erase [High Hopes]

After a week spent wandering the wilderness with Asuka & the person he thought to be Rei Ayanami, Shinji Ikari finally returns to the AAA Wunder. Here he must learn how to move forward with his life in this strange new world.

You Must (Not) Run Away Table Of Contents
You Must (Not) Run Away [Lifetime In A Week]
You Must (Not) Run Away [A Sort Of Homecoming]
You Must (Not) Run Away [A Run In The Wilderness]
You Must (Not) Run Away [On The Backs Of Angels]
You Must (Not) Run Away [Celebration Day]
You Must (Not) Run Away [The Web]
You Must (Not) Run Away [Selling England by the Pound]
You Must (Not) Run Away [Reunions]
You Must (Not) Run Away [At The Very Beginning...]
You Must (Not) Run Away [Shut Down The Guilt Machine]
You Must (Not) Run Away [The Call]
You Must (Not) Run Away [Hope]
You Must (Not) Run Away [Private Investigations]
You Must (Not) Run Away [Carpet Crawl]
You Must (Not) Run Away [Run Like Hell]
You Must (Not) Run Away [Ride The Comet]
You Must (Not) Run Away [Domino]
You Must (Not) Run Away [It's Never Twins]
You Must (Not) Run Away [The Miracle & The Sleeper]
You Must (Not) Run Away [The Bigger Picture]
You Must (Not) Run Away [Under A Glass Moon]
You Must (Not) Run Away [Deadlights]
You Must (Not) Run Away [Lifting Shadows]
You Must (Not) Run Away [Panic Station]
You Must (Not) Run Away [March Of The Machines]
You Must (Not) Run Away [Point Of No Return]
You Must (Not) Run Away [Strange Deja Vu]
You Must (Not) Run Away [The Tower Suite - Prelude: Welcome Home]
You Must (Not) Run Away [The Tower Suite - 01: The Damage]
You Must (Not) Run Away [The Tower Suite - 02: Together We Stand...]
You Must (Not) Run Away [The Tower Suite - 03: ...Divided We Fall]
You Must (Not) Run Away [The Tower Suite - 04: Hope Leaves]
You Must (Not) Run Away [The Tower Suite Finale: The Lamb Lies Down]
You Must (Not) Run Away [The Living Years]
You Must (Not) Run Away [Epilogue - Our New World]

Notes: Worth pointing out that the first two chapters of Hand.Cannot.Erase are fairly rough compared to the later ones, I wasn't that great with the editing process then. Fortunately I got a nice kick up the backside and improved it for the later chapters and future fics of mine. Also I'm sorry for the gratuitous references to music in the fic.
Last edited by jcmoorehead on Mon Aug 21, 2017 1:33 pm, edited 31 times in total.

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Re: Hand Cannot Erase/You Must (Not) Run Away | Post 3.33 Fics

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Postby Lennik » Thu Oct 20, 2016 6:34 pm

I've been following this story like crazy. I love post-3.0 fics, and this one is no exception.

I really like that there's ambiguity about how people worldwide feel about Shinji, with half the world blaming him for N3I and the other half seeing him as a fallen hero. That's how I would see a scenario like that playing out in real life, and it adds so much awesome potential for worldbuilding and politics.

xfs
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Re: Hand Cannot Erase/You Must (Not) Run Away | Post 3.33 Fics

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Postby xfs » Thu Oct 20, 2016 8:13 pm

There are very few post-Q fics and this is a good one.

You've got quite a few interesting subplots developing:
SPOILER: Show
- New Angles? Like "Human uncovers 25 new Dead Sea Scrolls in 2016", giant fail for SEELE lol
- Mutiny on Wunder
- WILLE vs UN
- Shinji's place in the world
- Asuka's contamination
- Rei's character growth
- MariRei

That would be quite a lot of romance, drama, politics and conspiracy. These are really worthy plot choices.

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Postby DarkBluePhoenix » Thu Oct 20, 2016 9:41 pm

Well, as I've said on ff.net, it's a wonderful story and well worth the read. You've done wonders with the Rebuild continuity to improve and expand on it. I can't wait to see what happens next in this story. Keep up the good work.
Keep Up the Good Work  SPOILER: Show
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Because your story is so good, it made Rei smile...
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Re: Hand Cannot Erase/You Must (Not) Run Away | Post 3.33 Fics

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Postby silvermoonlight » Fri Oct 21, 2016 3:12 am

Great to see this story posted in thread here as I had such great fun reading it and I really like how it fills in so much of 3.33 and what happened before and really fleshes out the character in a such a great way.
:asuka_happy:
Anywhere can be paradise as long as you have the will to live. After all, you are alive, so you will always have the chance to be happy.

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Sequel As The Divine Light Breaks For download version please go to AO3

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Postby jcmoorehead » Mon Oct 24, 2016 4:12 pm

Thank you guys so much, you're all super kind and I'm really glad you're enjoying the story so far.

I really like that there's ambiguity about how people worldwide feel about Shinji, with half the world blaming him for N3I and the other half seeing him as a fallen hero. That's how I would see a scenario like that playing out in real life, and it adds so much awesome potential for worldbuilding and politics.


Yeah this is something I really wanted to play about with, the whole ambiguity about Shinjis role in the N3I. I personally feel like Shinji did start a process but we saw Kaworu put an end to it at the end credits of 2.22 so something must have happened to bring that out further and that is something I will be addressing in the fic.

I've just uploaded the next chapter of it, it's one of the longer chapters. Based on the way things are going for the story so far it might end up being the longest story I have written. It's still got some way to do before it beats Conspiracy. I know length isn't everything (hurr hurr) but it is kinda exciting :)

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Postby silvermoonlight » Tue Oct 25, 2016 2:20 am

View Original Postjcmoorehead wrote:Thank you guys so much, you're all super kind and I'm really glad you're enjoying the story so far.



Yeah this is something I really wanted to play about with, the whole ambiguity about Shinjis role in the N3I. I personally feel like Shinji did start a process but we saw Kaworu put an end to it at the end credits of 2.22 so something must have happened to bring that out further and that is something I will be addressing in the fic.

I've just uploaded the next chapter of it, it's one of the longer chapters. Based on the way things are going for the story so far it might end up being the longest story I have written. It's still got some way to do before it beats Conspiracy. I know length isn't everything (hurr hurr) but it is kinda exciting :)


Awesome more updates :)

I never thought about what you just mentioned in terms of Kaworu appearing at the end 2.22, because that changes everything with regard to N3I and Shinji's role in it.
Anywhere can be paradise as long as you have the will to live. After all, you are alive, so you will always have the chance to be happy.

My Eva fanfiction ff.net Fading In To The Stolen Light For download version please go to AO3
Sequel As The Divine Light Breaks For download version please go to AO3

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Postby jcmoorehead » Tue Oct 25, 2016 3:50 am

View Original Postsilvermoonlight wrote:Awesome more updates :)

I never thought about what you just mentioned in terms of Kaworu appearing at the end 2.22, because that changes everything with regard to N3I and Shinji's role in it.


It's something that Kaworu does conveniently forget to mention during 3.33 when he shows Shinji what the N3I was. I don't necessarily think Kaworu had any malice in doing this, maybe in the actual story it was irrelevant, maybe the damage had already been done by that point. It is something that I have thought about for the story and want to address though.

I do have plans for Kaworu in this story, and I'm looking forward to getting to them.

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Postby jcmoorehead » Tue Nov 01, 2016 6:41 am

Latest chapter has now been uploaded, actually uploaded it last night but forgot to update the post here. Relationship building in this one and relentless teasing by Mari :P

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Postby silvermoonlight » Tue Nov 01, 2016 7:29 am

Awesome update and a really powerful chapter:)

SPOILER: Show
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Anywhere can be paradise as long as you have the will to live. After all, you are alive, so you will always have the chance to be happy.

My Eva fanfiction ff.net Fading In To The Stolen Light For download version please go to AO3
Sequel As The Divine Light Breaks For download version please go to AO3

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Postby DarkBluePhoenix » Tue Nov 01, 2016 7:50 am

Magnifique, mon ami! I can't wait to read the new chapter!
Not the Best Day...  SPOILER: Show
I bet after all that teasing, Asuka may feel like thisImage
Asuka: 'Think of my happy place, think of my happy place...'
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"That which does not kill us makes us stronger." Words of Wisdom from German Philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche.

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Postby jcmoorehead » Wed Nov 02, 2016 4:36 am

Thank you both so much, for the kind words here and also on FFN if you left a review. Really appreciate it. Just a quick note on the chapter because someone did alert me to the fact that it does cause a bit of an inconsistency with 2.22s ending in that Misato and Co did see the skewering.

That will be explained as the fic goes on. I've got everything planned out as far as the huge events go. Can't say too much more than though however as I don't want to spoil things.

Do however have a minor preview of the next chapter. It's all fully written and will be out on Monday. Think there are just one or two scenes I need to touch up though.

SPOILER: Show
Unlike a few people she had known, Shinji included, Asuka didn't have a problem when it came to spiders. She didn't exactly like the creatures but she was certainly not afraid of them and had little problems with disposing of them.

As she watched it come into view even Asuka had to admit that she might have been afraid of this particular spider. It was a very strange looking beast, the body of which hung barely a couple of metres off of the ground. From what she could see the body was split up into two segments. A large rounded front segment and a smaller segment behind.

Around the entire body were a number of grotesque eyes, each of them stared out in various directions. They were each surrounded by a peculiar triangular marking and it It wasn't for the occasional blinking of the eyes Asuka would have sworn that they had been painted on.

Eight individual legs protruded upwards out of the body towering over the trees of the forests and matching the height of Evangelion Unit 02. The legs were blade like in their appearance and coloured a dull grey. They bent back downwards with the base of the feet becoming larger and wider towards the ground. Asuka couldn't help but shudder as she watched the Angel skitter across the horizon towards her.

'Shinji would not like this one... at all...' She thought to herself with a smile.

"So what do you think Four-Eyes?" Asuka asked.

Mari gave a shrug, "I'm thinking that we could probably do with a giant boot right around now. Pretty disgusting looking isn't it?"

Asuka gave a nod of agreement, "Nothing I can't handle. Anything from the Wunder? Still telling us to standby?"
"You got it Princess, orders for now are to standby and simply observe."

"Observe? What fo-"

xfs
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Postby xfs » Wed Nov 02, 2016 4:59 am

I wouldn't be too worried about inconsistency between 2.0 and 3.0 because the mess has so much left unanswered in the canon and pretty much anything goes at this stage. Either way it wouldn't change things too much.

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Postby silvermoonlight » Wed Nov 02, 2016 5:18 am

View Original Postjcmoorehead wrote:Do however have a minor preview of the next chapter. It's all fully written and will be out on Monday. Think there are just one or two scenes I need to touch up though.

SPOILER: Show
Unlike a few people she had known, Shinji included, Asuka didn't have a problem when it came to spiders. She didn't exactly like the creatures but she was certainly not afraid of them and had little problems with disposing of them.

As she watched it come into view even Asuka had to admit that she might have been afraid of this particular spider. It was a very strange looking beast, the body of which hung barely a couple of metres off of the ground. From what she could see the body was split up into two segments. A large rounded front segment and a smaller segment behind.

Around the entire body were a number of grotesque eyes, each of them stared out in various directions. They were each surrounded by a peculiar triangular marking and it It wasn't for the occasional blinking of the eyes Asuka would have sworn that they had been painted on.

Eight individual legs protruded upwards out of the body towering over the trees of the forests and matching the height of Evangelion Unit 02. The legs were blade like in their appearance and coloured a dull grey. They bent back downwards with the base of the feet becoming larger and wider towards the ground. Asuka couldn't help but shudder as she watched the Angel skitter across the horizon towards her.

'Shinji would not like this one... at all...' She thought to herself with a smile.

"So what do you think Four-Eyes?" Asuka asked.

Mari gave a shrug, "I'm thinking that we could probably do with a giant boot right around now. Pretty disgusting looking isn't it?"

Asuka gave a nod of agreement, "Nothing I can't handle. Anything from the Wunder? Still telling us to standby?"
"You got it Princess, orders for now are to standby and simply observe."

"Observe? What fo-"


You know if this is who I think it is I don't think Asuka's in for a fun time.

SPOILER: Show
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Anywhere can be paradise as long as you have the will to live. After all, you are alive, so you will always have the chance to be happy.

My Eva fanfiction ff.net Fading In To The Stolen Light For download version please go to AO3
Sequel As The Divine Light Breaks For download version please go to AO3

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Postby Lennik » Wed Nov 02, 2016 8:07 pm

SPOILER: Show
Why do I get the feeling Wille has a weapon called "Das Boot"?

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Postby jcmoorehead » Mon Nov 07, 2016 4:35 pm

Once again thank you guys for the kind words, new chapter is now up along with the conclusion to the little snippet I posted. :)

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Postby silvermoonlight » Tue Nov 08, 2016 3:33 am

I really enjoyed this chapter on so many levels :)
Anywhere can be paradise as long as you have the will to live. After all, you are alive, so you will always have the chance to be happy.

My Eva fanfiction ff.net Fading In To The Stolen Light For download version please go to AO3
Sequel As The Divine Light Breaks For download version please go to AO3

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Postby jcmoorehead » Mon Nov 21, 2016 2:16 pm

Thank you so much. :)

Next chapter has been uploaded, sorry for the lengthy wait for it but it was a bit of a tough one to write. Next one is already done though and will be out next week :)

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Postby silvermoonlight » Mon Nov 21, 2016 3:10 pm

This chapter was so nice but seriously talk about yanking on my feels with the last line....

SPOILER: Show
Image
On another note nice to see more kitties in fanfiction
Anywhere can be paradise as long as you have the will to live. After all, you are alive, so you will always have the chance to be happy.

My Eva fanfiction ff.net Fading In To The Stolen Light For download version please go to AO3
Sequel As The Divine Light Breaks For download version please go to AO3

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Postby jcmoorehead » Wed Nov 23, 2016 8:21 am

I had that last part in mind for chapters, definitely a moment I wasn't looking forward to writing. Next chapter is currently being edited, only got two scenes left to edit and it'll be complete so will be released next Monday. So thought I'd offer a little preview. This is the first scene of the next chapter.

Chapter 13 Preview - Private Investigations  SPOILER: Show
2011 – North East England

"Mari Illustrious Makinami, born on 31st March 2001." Started the thick accented elderly woman, "Her mother was a scientist, worked for a place called Gehirn I think not sure what they did. No father, from what I understand he left them a long time ago but the mother and daughter were happy from what I understand."
She stopped for a moment before looking down, "It's always sad when a parent died but she died on Mari's Birthday in 2005, a freak accident at her lab. Was supposed to have been her last day as well."

Ryoji Kaji looked out of the window at the group of ten year old children playing out in the yard. It was a dismal day, grey clouds covered the sky and the forecast had been for rain. Yet this didn't seem to bother any of the children who were happily kicking a ball around the yard.

Mari was not hard to spot, she was the only girl out there and her brown pigtailed hair and red rimmed glasses certainly would have made her stand out regardless. She seemed to be playing out on the wings, picking up the ball when able to and easily running it past the others before crossing it in to one of the attackers to score. By all accounts she was very good.

Kaji turned again towards the woman just as she set down her cup of tea, "Mari has been here ever since."
"No other relatives? Has anyone been to visit her in all this time?" Kaji asked.

"No one, she was left with us one week after her mother's death. It was a man in a cheap suit and glasses that dropped her off. He told us the story that I just told you, only he was a bit more blunt about it. I can remember it all quite clearly, I always make a point to try and remember them when they're dropped off and when they leave here. It doesn't happen often through mind you."

"Would you mind telling me what happened please?" Kaji asked politely, this time sitting himself down in a comfortable leather chair opposite the woman.

"Well it was about ten o' clock at night when it happened. Pouring down with rain it was, one of the worst storms we've had. Flood warnings were put out and everything, anyway doorbell rang and there the two of them were. He was holding a large umbella, overcoat and I could see the suit he was wearing. Cold expression on his face, emotionless and neat facial hair I remember. His eyes were hidden behind the glasses he was wearing. I'll tell you something Mr. Kaji I didn't like him one little bit. Anyway he told me he was from a place called Gehirn, shown me identification and everything, well I had never heard of them before."

She paused to sip from her tea and then continued, "He asked us that we take in this little girl. I remember looking down at her and she was so different to what you see now. Blank expression, really tired and just... well her mother had just died so you can imagine. He explained to us what had happened and well... as stretched as we were at the time we couldn't exactly turn her down."

"I presume times were tough back then?" Kaji interjected.

"Very, we had been around for a long time Mr Kaji and we took in and helped the kids as best we could. If we were unable to find them a new home then they were brought up here and we provided for them but we were having trouble."

"The Second Impact?"

She nodded, "You're an orphan yourself aren't you Mr Kaji? Forgive me for asking but I can just tell."
Kaji smiled, "Lost my parents during Second Impact, was just me and my little brother for a long time. Didn't quite have places like this to go to back in Japan. We eventually got picked up but we were seperated and... I've not seen him since."

"You poor thing. There are so many of them out there, even today we're bringing in more and it just isn't enough. I sometimes think that kindness is something that has been lost when it comes to the human race."
She stopped and smiled again, "Sorry, I'm rambling. Back to the story, the man... well he did say that we'd be compensated for our troubles. Everything checked out, money started coming in immediately from Gehirn but... I still didn't like him."

Kaji took a drink from his own cup and frowned, "This man... did he give a name at all?"

"Oh yes, Rokubungi I believe it was. Gendo Rokubungi."


Also I'm doing a little oneshot for Asuka's Birthday.

Have a preview of that too.

This fic doesn't have a name yet lol  SPOILER: Show
‘Happy Birthday to me’

The thought suddenly pops into my head as if from the voice of someone mocking me on what has already become one of the worst days of my life. I swallow and force back any tears that are threatening to fall. I can’t let them appear, I can’t risk anyone seeing me cry. I said… I promised that I’d never cry. So for now all I’ll do is sit here and look out over this stupid and ugly city.

Another thought now pops into my head. It’s the one that has been popping up in my head for a few weeks. It gets louder and louder with each passing day and with each and every Angel that I have failed to do anything stop to.

‘You’re a failure. You’re not necessary. You can’t do anything on your own. You’re useless.’

I bring my hands up to my ears to try to block out any noise, as if that will actually do anything to help me. I shut my eyes tightly and try to force these horrible thoughts out of my head. I know that they won’t go though. Those thoughts have been there ever since mama left. Telling me that I’m a failure, pushing me to be better and making me be horrible to others. Forcing me to turn into that person the Angel revealed to me.

I desperately want to scream out and tell the thoughts to go away, I want to screw my hands into fists and pound the floor and yell and curse at it. I want to run forward and throw myself off of this ledge. I want this pain to end.

I open my eyes again and start to realize something. That Angel, the fifteenth Angel has finally done something that has been threatening to happen for a long time. It’s broken me. The once proud Asuka Langley Soryu is now nothing. All that I had tried to suppress has now been exposed in only a matter of minutes. All those barriers and walls I build up around me have crumbled.

I’m left only with the knowledge of how horrible and twisted I’ve become. It shown me everything. It shown me my past and my present and it shown me what I’ve become. All I could do was yell that the person it shown wasn’t the real me. I am a good person right? I’m not really that person it shown? The one who yells and screams, who threatened others and casts them aside to get what I want? I’m not really that person am I?
I realize that I am that person, and the real me… is nothing. I’m just a useless shell like my mama ended up being. I’ve been exposed for what I truly am. To make it worse I had to be rescued by that fucking doll.


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