[CYOA] Hans Fassbaender Zeppelin

General Role-Playing and collective works.

Moderator: Board Staff

chee
EGF Hate Machine
EGF Hate Machine
User avatar
Age: 30
Posts: 3337
Joined: Jul 16, 2007

[CYOA] Hans Fassbaender Zeppelin

  •      
  •      
  • Quote

Postby chee » Tue Mar 22, 2011 12:28 am

You wake up.

The agony of existence immediately overwhelms you.

You are Hans Fassbaender Zeppelin, uncle of Asuka Langley Soryu.

You crawl out of your bed and exit your expressionist black-and-white bedroom. After showering, you put on your spiked collar, large black sunglasses, black t-shirt and tight black pants. You turn on the radio, tuning it to Technik-Großeauswahlbibliothekmusik-Station 96.7. Einstürzende Neubauten serenades you as you stare intensely at a bust of Martin Heidegger over a bowl of Count Chocula. You suppose that he would say that this music brings out of concealment the Gestell that lies at the essence of modern instrumental techne.

The doorbell rings. You answer the door. It's your good friend, Werner Herzog. You greet him: "Guten tag." "Danke, Hans, Guten tag to you too. Do you suppose that the beauty of this day only stands as an addictive opiate with which we sedate ourselves in memory of worse days?" "Ja, Werner," you reply. "Hans, I wish to accompany you to Nerv for mein new documentary," he says. "I wish to record the agony of the Evangelion in all its existential majesty."

How do you reply?

A) "Nein, your continued presence is like a dull agonizing pain in the appendix of my being, and I shall similarly discard you as such."

B) "Ja, Asuka would be most delighted to receive a taste of real German culture, much as a bitch must inevitably return to the teat of the larger bitch."

C) "I am unaware you took interest in such things, you are like a wonder-filled naked youth in a field of half-women-half-aquatic-mammals."

[s]D) "NOW IS THE TIME ON SPROCKETS WHEN WE DANCE"[/s]
Last edited by chee on Tue Mar 22, 2011 8:25 pm, edited 2 times in total.

child of Lilith
Celestial Serendipity
Celestial Serendipity
User avatar
Posts: 10249
Joined: Mar 03, 2008
Location: Egg of Lilith

  •      
  •      
  • Quote

Postby child of Lilith » Tue Mar 22, 2011 12:31 am

A please. I'm expecting great things from this thread.
"Let the right one in. Let the old dreams die. Let the wrong ones go. They cannot do, what you want them to do."- Morrissey, Let the Right One Slip In

"Happy people can be so cruel"- Claudia, Silent Hill 3

"everlasting, true love, I am yours"- Rule of Rose

esselfortium
Angel
Angel
User avatar
Age: 29
Posts: 3392
Joined: Aug 21, 2009
Location: Ultra Hell
Gender: Female
Contact:

  •      
  •      
  • Quote

Postby esselfortium » Tue Mar 22, 2011 12:33 am

C. Maybe if we keep this conversation going we can get Werner to film himself eating his shoe.

Seele00TextOnly
Phospholipid Bilayer
Phospholipid Bilayer
User avatar
Age: 38
Posts: 1806
Joined: Sep 23, 2007
Location: Wilmington, NC
Gender: Female

  •      
  •      
  • Quote

Postby Seele00TextOnly » Tue Mar 22, 2011 12:33 am

B. Now is the time on Sprockets when Asuka must touch your monkey.
Check out my AMVs: Kaji/Misato in "18 Apostolos" & Kaworu and the Harpies in "The Beast That Shouted 'I' at the Heart of the World" w/ music by Esselfortium!!
Shinji embraces the otaku empowerment fantasy and dives headfirst into his mother's basement. -Chrad
Acts of man are better than acts of god. -Misato

MugwumpHasNoLiver
Erotic Humiliation
Erotic Humiliation
User avatar
Age: 27
Posts: 3139
Joined: Jan 17, 2009
Location: Chicago, IL
Gender: Male

  •      
  •      
  • Quote

Postby MugwumpHasNoLiver » Tue Mar 22, 2011 1:02 am

B.

My personal philosophy dictates that I must always select the option where Asuka is compared to a teat.
"Now, from Nature we obtain abundant information about ourselves, and precious little about others. About the woman you clasp in your arms, can you say with certainty that she does not feign pleasure? About the woman you mistreat, are you quite sure that from abuse she does not derive some obscure and lascivious satisfaction? Let us confine ourselves to simple evidence: through thoughtfulness, gentleness, concern for the feelings of others we saddle our own pleasure with restrictions, and make this sacrifice to obtain a doubtful result." -The Divine Marquis

"I agree Hans, but we have talked about those anal fisting analogies." -Werner Herzog

BeamKatana
Adam
User avatar
Age: 28
Posts: 57
Joined: Dec 13, 2010
Gender: Male

  •      
  •      
  • Quote

Postby BeamKatana » Wed Mar 23, 2011 5:01 pm

The more Asuka being forced to explain her terrifying uncle's presence to Nerv, the better. B.
"Nothing is true. Everything is permitted."
EGF's Herald of Nurgle

Sailor Star Dust
Kept you waiting, huh?
Kept you waiting, huh?
User avatar
Age: 32
Posts: 22713
Joined: Aug 13, 2006
Location: Living in Houston, TX
Gender: Female
Contact:

  •      
  •      
  • Quote

Postby Sailor Star Dust » Mon Mar 26, 2012 12:50 pm

B is the only option, of course. :mwahaha:
~Take care of yourself, I need you~

chee
EGF Hate Machine
EGF Hate Machine
User avatar
Age: 30
Posts: 3337
Joined: Jul 16, 2007

  •      
  •      
  • Quote

Postby chee » Wed Feb 20, 2013 11:51 am

You turn to Werner and adjust your glasses. "Yes. It would be good for Asuka to learn of the ecstatic poetic truth that drills its way from the embryonic sac that is your camera like a fist to a virgin anus," you say to him. "I agree Hans, but we have talked about those anal fisting analogies." "Ja, I apologize, Werner. I was much too overcome with trembling anticipation." "Ja, Hans." "Ja, Werner." You both finish your bowls of supermarket-brand imitation Crunch Berries. "It seems that it is time for us to embark on our journey to Tokyo-3." "Ja, it is."

How do you get there?

A) Take to the wide asphalt expanse of the autobahn in your smart car

B) Take the bus to Berlin International Airport

C) Clap your hands if you believe

Justacrazyguy
Pilot
Pilot
User avatar
Age: 21
Posts: 2321
Joined: Jul 06, 2012
Location: Portugal, Kingdom of Al-Garbh
Gender: Male

  •      
  •      
  • Quote

Postby Justacrazyguy » Wed Feb 20, 2013 1:09 pm

C

I believe in claping.
Nearly all teenage boys are dumbfucks-Xard

É altura de se tornarem pessoas interessantes.- My Classic Culture Teacher

MYANIMELIST-http://myanimelist.net/profile/Justacrazyguy

BPES
Shamshel
Shamshel
User avatar
Age: 27
Posts: 260
Joined: Jan 23, 2013
Location: UK
Gender: Male

  •      
  •      
  • Quote

Postby BPES » Wed Feb 20, 2013 1:18 pm

Also C

Just because I want to see where this leads.
In my experiance, there's only one thing harder than learning something new... and that is teaching it.

BEEP BEEP MUTHERF******

Live: charleserg7 Steam: aciescaelestis PSN: ChocoBP7

Reichu
Space-Time Teratoma
Space-Time Teratoma
Posts: 23039
Joined: Aug 21, 2004
Location: Lost in Bat Country
Gender: Female
Contact:

  •      
  •      
  • Quote

Postby Reichu » Mon Mar 04, 2013 5:26 pm

Hell with it, I'll go with C.

Justacrazyguy
Pilot
Pilot
User avatar
Age: 21
Posts: 2321
Joined: Jul 06, 2012
Location: Portugal, Kingdom of Al-Garbh
Gender: Male

  •      
  •      
  • Quote

Postby Justacrazyguy » Mon Mar 04, 2013 5:32 pm

View Original PostReichu wrote:Hell with it, I'll go with C.


Tell me Reichu, will we have to wait until 2015 for an update?
Nearly all teenage boys are dumbfucks-Xard

É altura de se tornarem pessoas interessantes.- My Classic Culture Teacher

MYANIMELIST-http://myanimelist.net/profile/Justacrazyguy

Reichu
Space-Time Teratoma
Space-Time Teratoma
Posts: 23039
Joined: Aug 21, 2004
Location: Lost in Bat Country
Gender: Female
Contact:

  •      
  •      
  • Quote

Postby Reichu » Mon Mar 04, 2013 6:46 pm

View Original PostJustacrazyguy wrote:Tell me Reichu, will we have to wait until 2015 for an update?

Only chee knows.

chee
EGF Hate Machine
EGF Hate Machine
User avatar
Age: 30
Posts: 3337
Joined: Jul 16, 2007

  •      
  •      
  • Quote

Postby chee » Mon Nov 04, 2013 1:11 pm

You stare at Werner. You can never know who is or who is not a traitor. But you dismiss this thought. "I believe it is time we embarked on our journey." "Ja, Hans." "Ja, Werner." "Shall we enter the smart-automobile and embark to the autobahn?" "No, Werner. If there is anything your delightfully tragic work has taught me, it is the power of imagination. We will transport ourselves with the sheer force of whimsical belief, much like the bloodied, emergent newborn willing himself through the dirty fornication-hole of a woman, slathered in afterbirth, just as he will be stained with the guilt of human being for the duration of his existence." "Very well put, Hans." The two of you stand next to each other. "Clap your hands if you believe, Hans." "This is what I will be doing, Werner." You both robotically clap your hands several times, and close your eyes. An enchanted rainbow space-time portal takes you halfway across the globe to the Geofront. "Now we must find the young frau." "Ja, Hans." Herzog walks towards the elevator. You forgo walking, and eurodance your way towards it instead. Walking is for those entrapped by slave morality.

What floor do you pick?


A) 47

B) 89

C) 109

Justacrazyguy
Pilot
Pilot
User avatar
Age: 21
Posts: 2321
Joined: Jul 06, 2012
Location: Portugal, Kingdom of Al-Garbh
Gender: Male

  •      
  •      
  • Quote

Postby Justacrazyguy » Mon Nov 04, 2013 1:56 pm

B.
Nearly all teenage boys are dumbfucks-Xard

É altura de se tornarem pessoas interessantes.- My Classic Culture Teacher

MYANIMELIST-http://myanimelist.net/profile/Justacrazyguy

Burger of Power
Adam
User avatar
Age: 24
Posts: 68
Joined: Aug 31, 2013
Location: The Burger King at Terminal Dogma
Gender: Male

  •      
  •      
  • Quote

Postby Burger of Power » Mon Nov 04, 2013 5:53 pm

This thread fills me with the joy and glee of ten thousand raging camels, lost in the ectastic frenzy of dubiously consented interspecies fornification.

I'm thus shall decant myself in favour of option number 3 in hopes of experimenting exposure to references to Vajrayana Buddhism.

SirRotgut
Adam
User avatar
Age: 39
Posts: 92
Joined: Oct 17, 2013
Gender: Male

  •      
  •      
  • Quote

Postby SirRotgut » Tue Nov 05, 2013 9:32 pm

C. !09
Nope

Nuclear Lunchbox
Agent Ahegao
Agent Ahegao
User avatar
Age: 21
Posts: 10212
Joined: Dec 13, 2012
Location: 可塑の椅子

  •      
  •      
  • Quote

Postby Nuclear Lunchbox » Tue Nov 05, 2013 9:34 pm

Option C is the way to go here.

Lance of LoL
Sandalphon
Sandalphon
User avatar
Age: 27
Posts: 540
Joined: Jan 13, 2013
Location: Terminal Dogma
Gender: Male

  •      
  •      
  • Quote

Postby Lance of LoL » Tue Nov 05, 2013 10:23 pm

Having read the apathetic eurotrash insanity of this thread through, I must open with an exuberant What the Fuck?!

But, other than that, C it is. I hope this is going somewhere good, It's no fun watching people hate humanity unless something actually happens to humanity.
Avatar: MAKE WAY FOR THE HOMO SUPERIOR!

>>>>Rebuild of Evangelion RP "If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is thank you, it will be enough."~Meister Eckhart<<<<

Nuke-kun: I know not of this "civil conversation" bullshit you speak of.

Agentomega
Lilin
Lilin
User avatar
Age: 28
Posts: 1385
Joined: Sep 18, 2007
Location: New Hampshire
Gender: Male

  •      
  •      
  • Quote

Postby Agentomega » Wed Nov 06, 2013 12:45 pm

Something draws me to A even though C will almost certainly win.

View Original Postchee wrote:You forgo walking, and eurodance your way towards it instead. Walking is for those entrapped by slave morality.

:lol:
Last edited by Agentomega on Wed Nov 06, 2013 12:57 pm, edited 2 times in total.
Avatar: Rhoe Amariyo (© 2010-2014 SQUARE ENIX CO., LTD. All Rights Reserved. FINAL FANTASY X|V)
Karigane Shirou in LoL's RP - Rebuild of Evangelion: We Are (Not) Together
"'I was a nerd before it was cool' ~Agent" ~Lance of LoL


Return to “Role-Playing Related”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest