Last night was a fun night.
Which also means my brain is going at full speed, which also means I can't sleep.
So, apologies for the following weird rant and the rambling.
Almost half a year ago, while in a huge get together of acquaitances and relatives and whatnot, I got reacquainted myself with some really old family friends who I hadn't seen in many years; they had been there for us in really harsh times, so it was a pleasant reunion. They were lovely and an absolute delight, but one of them was really insistent that "someone as handsome as me" -which prompted the most cynical and ugliest snort-laugh I've ever uttered- shouldn't be single at my age, so she offered to arrange a date with one of her nieces... who was standing right there -And her aunt was very insistent- I accepted mainly bacause she agreed and due to formality's sake, but felt incredibly weird nonetheless (at the time I genuinely thought I could just avoid it altogether if enough time went by; I was wrong).
Many months of mutual schedule conflicts later, the planets aligned and we got something planned out for Saturday--I wasn't looking forward to it, to be quite honest, but I'd try to make her have the best time I could offer and end the entire thing as quickly as possible. Strangely enough I wasn't nervous or anxious at all... perhaps since it all seemed "fake" due to the arranged nature of the entire thing, the stakes didn't affect me until much later? Like, right now? (the very least my anxiety could do is be consistent and immediate, goddamit; these delayed anxiety episodes are awful).
Anyways, we meet up at a nice pasta place, and after chatting for some time while waiting for a table (in the meantime I'm quite surprised her humor is just my type, and humor is one of my weaknesses) she kinda blurts: "look, I know what this is all about, to be honest this is very weird, and arranged dates via family connections are only comparable to drowning in mud, so let's just wing it"--And then it seemed like it'd be a really fun night.
We basically bonded over how neither of us wanted to be in said situation; how everyone we know is in a stable relationship and are succesful Grown Ups (unlike us, almost-nearing-30-year-olds); her rad tattoos (and the ones she might get done in the future); how we just want to find someone we genuinely love, and how both our relatives are pushing for each of us to get married and have kids asap--It was basically a sarcasm-o-marathon of epic proportions and a lot of talk about 90s tv shows (specially Buffy and Sabrina). After the meal we walked around for a bit, chatted for a long while, a kiss, a hug, and a goodnight.
We agreed to stay in touch while formally saying things didn't work out so as to set each other free of this nonsense (she did warn me her aunt would probably call me and offer to arrange a date with another niece, which I think I'll respectfully decline)--And though we did have a fantastic time together based on our shared humor and 90s 'a e s t h e t i c s' appreciation, it seemed evident our personalities and general tastes didn't quite match up, plus we had vastly different plans and projects for the future, both in the short and long term. That said, all in all, it turned out to be a surprisingly fun night and that's enough for me... Y-yay?
So, on one hand I was expecting this to be somewhat of a disaster, but I enjoyed myself throughout; on the other, it got me thinking about how meeting new people is actually a delightful experience, but also about how I don't do it more often and that it might probably be less common for me as time goes on... and that if things continue as they are, finding "that special someone" might not happen at all.
PS: Thanks, brain; you always know how to cheer things up.
I'm a lurker at heart.