November 21, 2031
Shinji was playing the cello when Asuka got home. She took a seat at the kitchen table, a morose expression on her face.
"How did it go?" Shinji asked.
She looked at him. "I'm pregnant," she said.
He smiled sadly. "I wondered," he said.
"What?" she asked, irate. "Why didn't you say anything?"
He gave her a bland look. "You can't be serious."
She flushed a bit, then coughed. "Well, yes, I guess I can see your point."
He shrugged. "But anyway, you were sick three mornings in a row. What else could it be?"
She bit her lip, thinking, then nodded. "Yeah, I guess so."
"Does Misato know?" he asked.
She shook her head. "I wanted to talk to you about it first," she said. "I'll give her a call in a bit."
"Okay." Shinji's fingers tapped against the neck of the cello. "What do you want to do?" he asked.
She shook her head. "I don't know," she said. "I don't think I can bring myself to get rid of it. It just seems wrong somehow." She rubbed her eyes with the heels of her hands. "But I can't . . . I mean, there's just no way . . . " she trailed off, gesturing helplessly. "I don't know."
He tried to give her a reassuring smile, but faltered midway through. "Well, whatever you decide, you won't be alone."
She smiled back at him. "Thanks."
"And I don't just mean me," he went on. "Misato will help too, I'm sure of it. And Kaji, and your mother, and Misato's father, and Hikari and Touji . . . " His eyes widened. "That's right!" he said. "They have their own kids now, so they know all about being parents! I'm sure they'll be a great help."
"They won't need to help if we don't keep it," she observed.
"But . . . " he began, frowning. "But that would mean we'd never see it again. I don't like that idea."
She rolled her eyes. "Then what do you suggest we do?" she asked.
"I don't know," he mumbled. "But not that."
She sighed. "I should call Misato." She frowned. "My mother too, I guess. And will you stop abusing your poor cello? You're gonna break it if you keep gripping it like that."
Shinji winced, then released the cello and let it lay on his shoulder. He stared at the floor for a time, lost in thought, then began packing up the cello as Asuka made her calls.

June 25, 2032
Shinji and Asuka stood before Misato's door, both of them tense and nervous.
"We can do this," he said to her. "We've faced down Angels and . . . and horrible things, and she's just a baby. She can't do anything to hurt us."
She scowled at him. "Idiot. I'm not afraid of her, I just . . . " She twitched nervously. "What if we hurt her? What if she doesn't like us? What if--"
He caught her fluttering hands in his own. "She'll like us," he said.
"How do you know?"
He smiled. "Hey, I like you. Why wouldn't she?"
Asuka rolled her eyes. "Stupid Shinji, just knock on the door."
He balked. "Why do I have to do it? You're the impetuous one, you do it."
She flushed, irritated. "Damn it, Shinji . . . "
"Hey," he said, "I'm just as nervous as you are, you know!"
"Tch," she said. "Coward."
Shinji's brows knit. "I am not!" His fist clenched in determination, and he raised his hand and knocked on the door. He glanced at her sidelong. "Why does that still work?" he grumbled.
She raised her arms. "Who can say?" she asked, smirking at him.
The door opened, to reveal a beaming Misato. "Hiya kids!" she said. "Come on in!"

When the Children entered Misato's apartment, they found Kaji waiting for them in the living room, a small bundle in his arms. "Hey you two," Kaji said. "Come on over."
They approached him nervously, fearful of the tiny person who awaited them. Kaji held the girl up in front of Asuka, indicating she should take hold of her. Asuka shook her head. "No," she began, "I can't, I--" Shinji stopped her with a hand on her back, giving her a gentle push. She looked at him, and he nodded at her. She gulped, squeezed her eyes shut, then opened them and hesitantly reached out to take the girl in her arms.
"Easy now," Kaji said. "Just rest her head in the crook of your arm . . . there you go, that's perfect. Don't worry, you're doing fine!"
Asuka looked at her daughter, and found that, for a moment, she couldn't even breathe. "She's beautiful," she whispered. Her eyes were a deep blue, like her father's, and she had a shock of light brown hair. She looked curiously at this strange new person, the perfect picture of innocence.
Shinji stared at the two, then looked away, unable to maintain eye contact. Misato frowned, then came up behind him and pushed him as he had Asuka moments before. "Go on," she whispered. "She's your daughter, say hello!"
He shook his head. "I can't," he said. "I just--"
"She's just a baby, Shinji," Misato said, interrupting him. "She doesn't know how to blame people. She just wants to be loved. All you need to do is take care of her."
Shinji hesitated, then once again clenched his hand in decision. He approached Asuka. She looked up, smiled at him, then back down at the infant in her arms. Shinji followed her lead. "H-" he began. He coughed, then continued. "H-hello," he said. "I'm Shinji. I'm, um . . . I'm your father.
Asuka nodded. "And I'm Asuka. I'm your mother." Her eyes began to water. "We can't . . . we can't take care of you like we'd like to," she said. "We're not . . . " She broke off, swallowing thickly. "But we love you very much!" she went on.
"Yes," Shinji agreed. "And we'll make sure you know, always! We'll never ignore you, or make you feel unwanted!" He stroked the girl's hair. "And we . . . we--" Tears were flowing down his cheeks, matching Asuka's.
"We'll never forget you!" Asuka burst out. "We'll always do our best for you, and when we can't, Misato and Kaji will . . . will . . . " Her shoulders began to shake.
Kaji took the girl back, and Asuka all but fell into Shinji's arms. The two held one another, crying openly.
Kaji shared a sad smile with Misato, who embraced the two. "It's fine," she said to them. "You did fine. Just take it easy, you did fine."

Kyoko frowned as she took a bite of her chicken, chewing thoughtfully.
"I suppose they're meeting their daughter now," Akira said.
Kyoko nodded, distracted.
"It's funny," he said. "Despite all they've been through, they seem to have embraced their child in a way we never could."
Kyoko looked up. "Speak for yourself," she said, indignant. "I--" He arched an eyebrow, and she trailed off. "I always loved her," she mumbled.
He nodded. "Of course you did. But that's not what I said, is it?"
Kyoko lowered her hand to the table, chopsticks idle. "She was everything to me, and yet . . . my work, it was so important. It was about saving the world! That was so much more important." She grimaced. "Or at least, that's what I told myself."
He took a bite of rice, but said nothing.
"Do you think this plan of theirs will work?" she asked. "I mean, they're essentially giving up their child--"
Akira shrugged. "As Kaji said, he can afford to stay at home these days. I think it's less giving her up than it is making raising her a joint effort. And keeping her in one household gives her a sense of continuity that she might otherwise lack." He smiled mildly. "Plus, I think Kaji and my daughter just want to raise a child together. It's as much for their sake as it is for the Children's, I think."
Kyoko shook her head. "Those two . . . " she said. "They humiliate me and humble me, even now. Even after all they've been through they continue to highlight my failings and rise above them at every turn. How do they do that, when it's all they can do to keep their lives on track?"
Akira smiled at her. "We've always known they were rather extraordinary," he observed mildly.
"Tch. Is that supposed to make me feel better?" she snapped.
He shrugged again. "Well, it's your doing, at least in part."
"Hmph."
Akira chuckled, then returned to his rice.

July 17, 2032
Misato opened the door, finding Asuka standing on the other side. "Heya Asuka!" she chirped. Her demeanor changed as she took in the state of the former Second Child. She had dark circles under her eyes, and her features were tired and drawn. "Hey," she asked, concern in her voice, "are you alright?"
Asuka shrugged. "I can barely stand that idiot most days, but when he's gone . . . " She shook her head and looked away.
Misato frowned. "It's only been three days," she said. "And he'll be back tomorrow . . . "
Asuka shrugged.
"Hmmm," Misato said. "Maybe this isn't the best night for Kaji and me to--"
Asuka waved her off. "Don't be ridiculous," she said. "I said I'd babysit, and I will."
"But--" Misato began.
"Do you think I'll hurt her?" Asuka snapped. "My own daughter?"
Misato met her gaze squarely. "No," she said. "I'm not worried about her. I'm worried about you."
Asuka glared at her, then looked away. "She's my child," she said. "Taking care of her is my responsibility, not yours. I won't make excuses."
"Well . . . " Misato said. She traded a glance with Kaji. After some consideration he gave her a grave nod. She pursed her lips. "Are you sure about this, Asuka dear? It's just a date for us; we can always change it--"
Asuka shook her head. "If not now, when?" she asked. "There will always be an excuse to put it off. But if she needs me, what am I going to do? Put it all on Shinji? Make excuses about not being ready? Bullshit! I'm her mother. It's up to me to take care of her. Not you." She jerked her head toward Kaji. "Not him. Me."
"Fine," Misato said. She smiled, then looked around the apartment. "Well, we should be ready to go. Her diapers and other supplies are on the table there, and her formula's in the fridge. And of course you have our cell numbers, if you need anything." She frowned. "Sorry Heishiro bailed on us; he was supposed to be here, but he conveniently had club activities at the last minute . . . "
Asuka shook her head. "I don't care," she said.
Misato sighed. "Well, Pen-Pen's here, at least. And you can understand him better than most, so--"
"It's fine," Asuka said. "Just leave already."
"Fine, fine," Misato said, then made her way to the door. She exchanged another look with Kaji, then made her exit.
Asuka looked at her daughter, then crossed her arms. "Well, kid," she said, "looks like it's just you and me."

Misato poked aimlessly at her udon noodles.
"You look like you bear heavy thoughts," Kaji said.
Misato frowned. "I'm worried about her," she said.
Kaji chuckled. "Why do I get the feeling that tonight was more of a test for her than a date for us?"
Misato flushed. "Sorry," she said.
Kaji shook his head. "It's fine," he said. "I'm worried about her too."
"Was this really alright?" she asked. "She doesn't . . . she doesn't seem ready, but--"
Kaji shrugged. "Asuka's Asuka," he said. "She does things her way, no matter what anyone else might say. And," he added, holding up a hand, "she does the best she can. We have to let her find her own way, even if it hurts her in the process."
Misato scowled at him. "That sucks," she said.
He shrugged. "What would you have us do? Make all of her decisions for her?"
"Of course not," she said.
"It's her life," he said. "We can help her out, but we can't live it for her."
She frowned. "She's in pain, Kaji. We owe her so much . . . "
"What we owe her," Kaji said, "is the chance to live. To love, to laugh, and, yes, to hurt. We owe it to her to support her without interfering, and to help her when she falls. But if we don't give her the opportunity to fall we aren't giving her the opportunity to live."
She scowled at him again. "You're irritating when you're right," she said.
He laughed. "Sorry," he said. He held up the dessert menu. "Perhaps I can distract you with dessert?"
"Make it good, buster," she said.

Misato entered her apartment, and immediately sensed something amiss. Ryuko's crib was empty, and Asuka sat with her against a wall on the opposite side of the room. Pen-Pen watched them, his beak open, at a loss. "Asuka?" she asked.
Ryuko whined at the sound of her voice, and Misato breathed a sigh of relief. Asuka's eyes were squeezed shut, her grip on her daughter strong yet fragile. "I told you I wouldn't hurt her," she said. "I told you! I'd never hurt her. I'd never--"
Kaji moved to take Ryuko from her. "It's fine, Asuka dear," he said. "She's fine. You don't have to worry anymore." Asuka held onto the child, then reluctantly relinquished her grip.
"Are you okay?" Misato asked, kneeling down next to her.
"Whark," Pen-Pen said.
Misato blinked. "Eh?" she asked.
Asuka swallowed, then shook herself. "She wouldn't stop crying," she said. "I fed her, I changed her diaper, I held her . . . I even sang to her. But she wouldn't stop crying." She looked at Misato. "Nothing I did worked!" she said. "I did everything I was supposed to do, and nothing worked! Why didn't it work? Why--"
"Shhh," Misato said. She took the girl in her arms. "Easy, now," she said. "Take it easy."
"She didn't want me," Asuka said. She looked at her daughter, who settled easily into Kaji's arms. Her eyes widened, hurt. "She wouldn't do that for me!" she said, watching them. "Why wouldn't she do that for me? I did everything I was supposed to do, but--"
"Asuka!" Misato snapped.
Asuka stared at her, wild-eyed.
"Look," Misato said. She ran a hand through her hair. "It's not about what you did, it's about how you did it. You're nervous, scared. She picked up on that, and it upset her."
Asuka grimaced. "So it's my fault, then?" she asked.
"No!" Misato frowned. "I mean, yes. Maybe." She sighed, then shook her head. "Look, it doesn't matter whose fault it was, okay? She's just a baby, she doesn't understand anything. Don't worry about who's to blame. I'm just trying to explain what's going on."
"What's going on," Asuka said bitterly, "is that I'm a failure as a parent."
Misato laughed at her. "Don't be an idiot," she said.
Asuka's lip twitched, but she held her tongue.
"You're not a failure, Asuka," Misato said. "You just need practice."
"Tch," Asuka said. "When did you and Kaji ever practice?"
Misato glared at her. "You think we didn't?" she asked.
Asuka stared at her, confused.
"What about you?" Misato asked. "What about Shinji?"
Asuka blinked. "Eh?"
Misato grabbed her in a headlock, then ground a knuckle into Asuka's head. "You think it's easy raising broken children like you? Eh? Do you?"
"Ow!" Asuka whined. "Quit it!" Misato did, and Asuka glared at her. "We aren't babies!" she said. "It's different!"
"Sure it is," Misato said, "but it's still practice. And don't forget, we don't have your baggage. Ryuko brings to mind some painful memories for you and Shinji, but she doesn't for us. That makes it easier for us to relax around her."
"Hmph. Like it matters," Asuko said. She looked at Ryuko. "She'll never accept me."
"Buu!" Misato said.
"Shut up!" Asuka said. "It's true!"
"It is not," Misato said, scoffing at her. "I mean, okay, yes, tonight was rough. But what about the next time? What about when you're here with Shinji? Or with us? What happens when you know what you're doing? Do you really think it's that's simple?"
Asuka shrugged. "I don't think it matters," she said.
Misato frowned, then smacked her former charge on the forehead. "Dummy," she said.
"Stop it!" Asuka snapped, rubbing her forehead.
Misato shrugged. "If you want me to stop, stop saying stupid things."
Asuka glared at her. "You're annoying," she said.
Misato shrugged again. "Maybe. But, look. You're obviously committed, and that's important. But wanting something doesn't automatically give you the ability to make it happen, alright? You're a bright girl, Asuka, but you're not infallible. Sometimes you need help."
Asuka looked at her daughter, then looked away. "That much is obvious," she said bitterly.
Misato sighed. "Look," she said, "my point is that you have that support! We're here to help you, me and Kaji. I realize it's unconventional, and a blow to your pride" -- Asuka flinched, but Misato carried on -- "but it's something we're willing to do. It's not that crazy an idea, is it?"
Asuka thought a moment, then shook her head. "I guess not," she mumbled.
Misato hugged her. "But that's just temporary," she said. "After awhile, you'll be fine."
"Yeah?" Asuka asked. "Says who?"
Misato grinned at her. "Says me!" she chirped.
Asuka looked at her, then turned to look at her daughter. "But--" she began.
"Hey," Misato said. Asuka looked at her. "Sometimes you just have to accept that I'm right, okay? Remember who had all the crazy plans to defeat the Angels? The crazy plans that worked?"
Asuka huffed. "Just because you're insane doesn't mean you're right--" she began.
"Asuka." Misato said, a note of irritation in her voice.
Asuka looked at her, then gulped. "Is it really okay?" she asked. "I mean--"
"Yes," Misato said, "It really is. I promise."
Asuka sank into her embrace. "But what if it isn't?" she asked.
Misato held her tightly. "Then I'll take care of you," she said. "And her."
Asuka clutched at her, then took a deep breath and stepped away. "Okay," she said. She stared at Misato, then at her daughter. "Okay," she repeated.

July 25, 2032
Asuka took a deep drag off of her cigarette, then blew out the smoke. "You better get going," she said. "Misato said 3 p.m., right?"
"Yeah," Shinji said, nodding. He frowned at her. "You're not coming, then?"
She shook her head. "I can't," she said. "I just--" she broke off, then sighed. "Sorry, Shinji. I just can't."
Shinji sighed. "Alright," he said. He gathered his things, then headed for the door.
"It's not like I don't realize, you know," she said.
He looked back. "Eh?" he said.
"That I'm a hypocrite, I mean. I went on and on about not rejecting her, and . . . " she broke off, then shrugged meekly.
He stared at her, indecisive. His fingers twitched. "Well, it's not like I'm in any position to judge," he said.
She nodded, taking another drag off of her cigarette.
"And you'll have other chances," he went on. "She's not going anywhere--"
"Stop apologizing for me," she said. "Just go. Do your best."
He stared at her for a moment, then clenched his fist. "I will," he said.

Misato opened her front door, only to find Shinji standing on the other side. "Heya kiddo," she said. "How ya doin'?"
"I'm fine," he said. "I'm here to--" He gulped. "--to take Ryuko for a while."
"Great!" Misato said. She stepped aside, letting him in, then poked her head through the door. "No Asuka?" she asked.
Shinji shrugged. "She's not feeling up to it, I guess."
Misato frowned.
"Don't be too hard on her," Shinji said. "She just--"
Misato waved him off. "Relax, Shinji. I've been looking after the both of you for a long time, so it's not like I don't understand. I'll look in on her later."
"Thanks," he said.
"So you're going it alone, then, eh?" she asked.
He nodded.
"Hmmm." she said. "Are you sure you're up to this?" She made a useless gesture with her hands. "Looking after her alone, I mean."
He nodded. "Yes!" he said. "I'm ready! Please give me a chance!"
Misato laughed at him, then shrugged. "Alright," she said. She jerked her head toward Ryuko's crib. "Ryuko's been changed and fed, so she should be good for a while. I'll be out for a couple of hours, but you have my cell. Be sure to call if there are any problems!"
He nodded. "Right," he said.
"Do your best!" she said, stepping through the doorway.
"I will!" he said.

Shinji stood in the middle of the room, looking down at his daughter. He picked her up. "Um, hi," he began.
She stared at him, unconcerned.
"I don't really know what to do here," he said. "I mean . . . " He frowned, thinking. "You have to understand, your mother means everything to me. If anything ever happened to her I don't know what I'd do, so . . ."
She made a grasping motion with her hand. He put a finger in front of her and she gripped it lightly.
Shinji laughed at her. "It's not your fault," he said. "I know you didn't mean to hurt her. It's just . . . "
Pen-Pen looked over at Shinji, watching as the man struggled with his daughter. "Whark," he said.
Shinji looked at the penguin. "Sorry, Pen-Pen," he said. "I don't speak bird."
Pen-Pen shook his beak and warbled, then went back to watching his program.
Shinji turned back to his daughter. "I'm sorry," he said. "I shouldn't . . . " He stroked her face, and she clutched his thumb with her hand.
Ryuko stared at him, gurgling happily. She smacked his nose with her free hand, and Shinji laughed despite himself. "Yeah," he said. "That's probably what your mother would say, too."
Ryuko cooed at him.
Shinji took a deep breath, then sat down next to Pen-Pen on the floor. He rocked his daughter gently, losing himself in her bright, blue eyes.

Misato was smoking a cigarette near the incinerators when he arrived.
"Hey, Katsuragi!" Kaji called. "How you doin'?"
She waved at him, but paid him no mind.
He exited the car and then approached her, a thoughtful look on his face. "Where's the shrimp?" he asked.
"She's with Shinji," she said.
Kaji's eyes widened. "Oh?" he asked. "Hmmm. Interesting." He stared at Misato for a moment, then asked, "And how is he doing?"
She shook her head and sighed. "I have no idea. I've known the kid for eighteen years now, and I still don't get how his mind works."
Kaji frowned. "That bad, huh?"
She shrugged.
He sat next to her. "What about Asuka?" he asked.
"Who knows?" she asked. "She didn't show up today."
Kaji leaned back on his elbows. "She's never wanted children," he mused. "Ever since she was a girl. I thought her attitude might change once she got a taste of being a parent, but maybe I was wrong about that."
Misato took a puff of her cigarette. "I don't think that's it," she said.
"Oh?" Kaji asked.
"Asuka has an impressive amount of resolve," Misato said. "She never wanted children, no, but once she got pregnant . . . " Misato shook her head. "Even if she didn't want a child she was determined to do right by it. No, I think she's scared," she said. "She screwed up and she panicked, and Shinji's reluctance has her all worked up. She knows she can't handle this on her own, and she's not sure he can pick up the slack."
Kaji frowned. "They're too attached to one another," he said.
"Yeah," Misato agreed, nodding. She blew out a gusty sigh. "Damn it! They're thirty years old, this shouldn't be our problem anymore."
Kaji laughed. "I thought you wanted children," he said.
"I do," she said. "Just, you know, actual children, not adults who act like them."
Kaji looked up at the sky, smiling sadly. "We reap what we sow," he said softly.
Misato scowled at him. "You know, Kaji, no one likes a man who reveals too much."
Kaji laughed. "Sorry, sorry. Let's just do our best, then, shall we?"
Misato nodded. "It's the least we can do," she said.

Misato didn't know what to expect when the door opened before her, but a wobbly Asuka wasn't it. The woman took a deep drag off of her cigarette before stepping aside and letting Misato enter the apartment. Misato took a look at the kitchen table, and her mouth quirked up in a wry grin as she spied a bottle of whiskey and a half-empty glass. "Guess you're pretty serious tonight, eh?" she asked.
"Bite me," Asuka muttered. She returned to her place at the table, staring at the wall before her as she fingered the glass.
Misato got a glass of her own, then joined Asuka at the table. She poured a bit of the amber liquid into the glass, then took a swig, grimacing at the taste.
"Is there something you want?" Asuka asked.
Misato shook her head. "Not really," she said. "I'm just checking up on you, that's all."
Asuka laughed in bitter amusement.
"You're really worked up about this, aren't you?" Misato asked.
Asuka shrugged.
Misato nodded toward the cigarette. "I thought Shinji didn't let you smoke."
"Shinji has his opinions," Asuka said. "I accommodate them when it suits me, but he doesn't own me."
"No, of course he doesn't," Misato agreed. She stared at Asuka appraisingly. "I expected you to show up with him tonight," she said.
"So did he," Asuka said.
"Why didn't you?"
Asuka shook her head, then took a sip of her drink. "Just wasn't happening tonight."
"I know your last effort didn't go so well--" Misato began.
"Hah!" Asuka spat. "That's the understatement of the decade. It was a fucking disaster, Misato."
Misato frowned. "I wouldn't go that far," she said. "You looked after her properly, and didn't hurt her. For a first-time parent that's not so bad."
"Stop it," Asuka sid. "The point of these little exercises is to bond with her and become actual parents, not to do the bare minimum necessary."
"You won't be able to do that if you don't practice, you know," Misato observed.
Asuka glared at her. "Thanks ever so much for pointing that out, Captain Obvious."
Misato sighed. "Asuka--"
Asuka waved her off. "Whatever, it doesn't matter. Tonight's about him, not me."
"Eh?" Misato asked.
"It's his turn, his chance to do well where I screwed up," she said. "He doesn't need me there distracting him."
Misato quirked an eyebrow. "Is that what this is all about?" she asked.
Asuka shrugged. "That, and Ryuko. She's nervous around me, so she wouldn't know how to react around him. If I'd gone tonight it would have turned into a nightmare for all of us."
Misato tapped her teeth with a nail. "I see," she said. "As reasoning goes it's not the worst, though I think you're being too hard on yourself." When Asuka didn't respond she just sighed. "Well, why don't I stay for a bit, then? It's been a while since we hung out, after all, and we could stand to catch up for a bit."
"Wonderful," Asuka said sullenly.
Misato frowned. "If you're rather I left . . . " she said.
Asuka looked at her through narrowed eyes, struck by the tone in the woman's voice. "Well," she relented, "I guess I could use the company. And like you said, it's been a while. So, I guess it's fine."
"Great!" Misato chirped. She grabbed the bottle of whiskey, refilling her glass. "This is gonna be fun," she said. "Let me tell you what happened at work the other day . . . "

Kaji entered his apartment. "I'm back!" he called.
"Welcome back!" Shinji replied.
Kaji entered the living room, then crossed over to Shinji. He squatted in front of the younger man, peering at him closely. "How did it go?" he asked. Ryuko appeared to be sleeping in her father's arms.
"Um, okay, I guess," Shinji said. "She didn't cry or fuss much, which is what I was worried about."
Kaji grinned at him. "That means she trusts you," he said. "It's a good sign."
"Pen-Pen tried to tell me some things, but I can't understand him," Shinji said.
Kaji laughed. "I think Asuka's the only one who can." He frowned. "Katsuragi acts like she can sometimes, but I think she's bluffing. I think Pen-Pen just plays along because it amuses him."
"That sounds depressingly plausible," Shinji agreed, nodding. He handed Ryuko to Kaji. She stirred, but didn't wake. "Where's Misato?" he asked.
"She stopped by to see Asuka," Kaji said.
Shinji wrinkled his nose. "She'd busted out the whiskey and cigarettes even before I left."
"Does she do that often?" Kaji asked.
Shinji shook his head. "No, not at all. She rarely drinks, and she knows I hate the cigarettes. But when she's really stressed she just does what she wants to do, and if I don't like it too bad."
Kaji chuckled. "She can be a real handful like that, I guess," he said. "But don't worry; once she hears about how you did tonight I think her mood will improve considerably."
"I hope so," Shinji said.

Shinji opened the door to his apartment. "I'm back," he said.
Misato grinned at him. "Welcome back, Shinji dear," she said. "How did it go?"
Shinji frowned at the slight slur in her voice, then sighed and let it go. "Fine, I think," he said. "No major problems at least."
"Ha!" she said. "I knew it!" She turned toward Asuka. "See, Asuka dear? You were worried over nothing!"
"Figures," Asuka mumbled. She glared at him. "You always gotta one-up me, eh?"
He stared at her deadpan. "Says the woman who's fluent in three languages, has two Ph.D.s, and does guest lectures at MIT and Harvard and other places on a regular basis."
Asuka waved him off. "Not the point," she mumbled. "'m talkin' 'bout the important stuff. Y'know, like Piloting, and getting recognized, and parenting, and . . . " she trailed off, losing focus.
"Asuka," Misato said, frowning, "you're being mean. And besides, wasn't this your plan from the beginning?"
Asuka's eyes widened, and she held out her hands before her in alarm. "Quiet!" she whispered, a bit too loudly. "Don't blow my cover!"
Shinji laughed lightly. "You mean it was supposed to be a secret?"
Asuka glared at him, then decided putting him in his place wasn't worth the effort. She rested her chin on her hand and closed her eyes.
Misato sobered a bit. "She's been tied up in knots about it all night," she said.
He put an arm around Asuka's shoulders, squeezing gently. "Well, I did okay," he said. "When we go together next time I'll know what to do, so you'll be okay."
She looked up at him, then leaned against him, wrapping an arm around his waist. "Good," she said. "I like it when you're useful." Her grip slackened, and her breathing began to even out.
"Time to put her to bed," Misato observed, smiling at the girl. She stood. "I'll get out of your hair, then." She made her way to the door, then turned back and smiled. "You did a good job today, Shinji. We'll make a decent father out of you yet!"
He smiled at her, helping Asuka up as he did so. "Thanks," he said. "I'll do my best!"

July 21, 2032
Asuka awoke, screaming. She bolted upright, clutching her stomach as horrible visions assaulted her mind.
"Asuka!" Shinji yelled. He moved to put an arm around her, but she violently pushed him away. He stared at her in concern as she took deep breaths, struggling to reign in her turbulent emotions. After some time she calmed a bit, and allowed him to embrace her. "Maybe . . . " he began. He gulped. "Maybe we put off seeing her, at least for now."
She scowled at him. "Idiot!" she said. "It's not her fault."
"I don't care," he said. "If seeing her does this to you--"
"This has nothing to do with her," she spat. "It's just the same old shit, attacking me from a different angle."
"But--"
"Stop it," she said. "We are not abandoning her." She glared at him. "Unless you want to become a copy of your father?"
Shinji froze. The acid in her voice was unmistakable. "That's not fair," he said.
"You disgust me," she said. She lay down, turning away from him. "Using me as an excuse to run away from your own daughter? How pathetic."
"That's not what I'm doing!" he yelled, insistent. "Even if she is my daughter, I put you first!"
She flinched. "Moron," she said. "I'm an adult, and she's just a baby. How can you even begin to think that way?"
He reached out for her. "But . . . " he began.
She turned, grasping his arm and squeezing painfully. "No!" she said. "God, even after all this time, you still don't get it?"
Shinji recoiled from the venom in her words.
"She is your daughter," she said. "You will not reject her. I won't allow it!"
He looked away from her, tears streaming down his face. "What am I supposed to do, Asuka? I can't just--"
"Shut up!" she said, sneering at him. "No more excuses. Do as I say, Shinji. I won't forgive you if you don't."
He took a deep breath, steadying himself. "She'll hate me," he said. "Just like my father did. She'll hate me, and--"
"Idiot," she said. "Your father was afraid of you, but Ryuko isn't. You have nothing to fear from her."
Shinji frowned, unconvinced.
"Just try, dummy," she said. "She won't know the difference. She's just a baby, remember?"
Shinji took another deep breath. "Fine," he said. "If that's what you want, then--" he began.
She scowled at him. "Is that the only reason?" she asked.
"No!" he said, a bit too quickly. He thought a moment, then clenched his fist. "Like you said, she's my daughter. I won't run away."
She stared at him a moment longer, then nodded. He lay down next to her, and she let him put an arm around her and pull her close. "You'll be alright, Shinji," she said. Her mouth quirked up in a wry grin. "After all, I'll protect you."
"Hey!" he said.
"No, no, it's fine," she said. "After all, babies are sooo frightening."
He bit her shoulder. "That's enough out of you!" he said.
She laughed at him, resting her hands on his chest as she did so. She kneaded her fingers gently. "I'm counting on you," she said quietly, pressing close. "I'm no good with her, so you need to help me out."
Shinji blinked in astonishment, then nodded and wrapped his arms tightly around her. "I will," he said. "I promise!"