Fanfic Firing Squad: Father

Oh God...I'm laughing, cringing from aching teeth, and in bodily pain. That can't be a good combo.

Good job on the riffing, Ursus.

Did I seriously convince myself it couldn't get any worse?

I'm not even reading the actual story pieces anymore, just the commentary.

Jesus, this fic really is the worst. It's like Lord Talon decided he couldn't milk the whole 'selling-his-motorcycle' bit any further so he moved on to the riveting 'selling-his-cello' bit. What's Shinji going to sell next, Pen-Pen?

This thing isn't so much painful to read as it is boring. I can't imagine how the author managed to pad out this yawn fest for however many more chapters this thing runs for.

Oh. My. Fucking. God.
I have no problem with the characters becomming happy (*Rebuild-Fan*) but MAN, a Fic needs a PLOT!
All the intresting conflict happened off-screen and this may as well be the most OOC thing I have seen in my life!
I'm not a Fan of Asuka/Shinji, so perhaps I'm not the best judge on that account but... Shouldn't an Asuka/Shinji fanfiction contain... well, Asuka and Shinji, for example? I gave up at the proposal, but this was because of your funny commentaries. It should have been killed dead at the point at which Asuka HID BEHIND SHINJI. What happened to her kick of doom? Okay, she was pregnant, but she's still motherfuckin' Asuka.
Not to mention that Cannon!Asuka would desperately want an abortion to be able to pilot EVA (or out of some twisted fear of becomming like Kyoko) and Misato/Shinji would have to talk her out of it. She states it in the frakin' show that she doesn't want any kids. I think she WOULD agree to keep the kid if the right buttons are pressed, but she'd need A LOT of persuation, nothing short of, duh, a slap across the face?
Oh, and Shinji's beating up about anyone. Sure, he's stronger than he looks, but this is just beyond what the laws of physics allow.
And Touji helped beating up the OC guy with PROSTHETIC LIMBS?
Bah, trying to list everything that was wrong in this fic is hopeless.
They didn't even try to get Rei right.
They just didn't care...

The author has made Shinji sound like a surpreme dickhead.
If only I could hit him every time someone went OOC.

And here i though that tiny letters couldn't cause physical pain. I was wrong.

That said, the impossible levels of OOC are indeed amusing. If it weren't for the cringeworthy attempts at comedy, this would be perfectly unintentionally hilarious.

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They just didn't care...

Not really, the author just has a... Rather unique idea of the series and fanfics.

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Oh yeah. Say what you want about Canon!Shinji but at least he wasn't arrogant.

I guess some people could see his selfishness as arrogant tough. However i didn't find OOC Shinji as a complete dickhead, two dimensional and stupid yeah, but not particularly dickhead.

Man this fic is horrible at least the commentary makes it better. I wonder what Evangelion this author watched.
Shinji is such an ass in this fic
pen pen should get rid of them all.

I think the majority of you just do not get it.

Yes, the Fic was VERY VERY OOC. We get that already.

However, it is well written, and emotionally evocative, especially if you are a male with any shred of honor whose actually in real love with a girl (or has been). It is EXACTLY how I would like to think I would behave in the same situation.

Is it how I write the characters in my fics? No (I stick to canon and believable character progressions) But that's my style choice. Doesn't mean it's right

It's not supposed to be canon. It doesn't have to be. If this thread is the reason he abandoned this fic, then I hope you all get stepped on by an EVA. I just hope he comes to his senses and finishes it. Contrary to what the plebeian masses may think, this is a very beautiful story.

Just read it for the WAFF, and get over the pretentiousness, people.

The word Misogynistic has been used a lot in regards to this fic in this thread. I think part of my anger comes from the misuse of this word. Just to be clear, the definition is

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Misogyny (play /mɪˈsɒdʒɪni/) is the hatred or dislike of women or girls. According to feminist theory, misogyny can be manifested in numerous ways, including sexual discrimination, denigration of women, violence against women, and sexual objectification of women. (from Wikipedia)

Please tell me in what way the (very OOC, granted) Shinji is hating Asuka.

Was he ever sexually discriminating against her? Some may say that he did so when he requested she be placed off the active duty roster. I think it was more concern for her condition (pregnant, hello?) and the fact that his father might use her in combat when it would be not in her best interests to do so. He was trying to not let his father take advantage of her.

Was he ever denigrating of her? I mean seriously, he practically worships her in this fic. So, um, no.

Was he ever violent against her? Again, obvious no.

Did he ever sexually objectify her? Hell, he tells her repeatedly that he will wait until SHE is ready for that. Again, all through out the fic it is clear that he treats her as far more than a sexual object.

And yes, I will agree with you that it has major characterization issues. If that is the most important thing to you in a fanfic, that is, of course, your opinion, and I respect it.

What was pretentious, to me, was harping on and on about how bad it was, when it was clear that the underlying message of the fic was conveniently swept under the rug. I am not trying to be an asshole, but allow me to clarify for those who may not see it this way, and to respond to your "ten-foot pole comment", esselfortium.

Shiniji in this fic was trying to act with Honor and Chivalry (look it up, it's a sadly ignored concept in our society today). He honored and respected Asuka. Never once did he force his attentions on her, but offered himself to try and make her happy. He did not really start acting like her protector until she accepted, and it was clear that she wanted him to (Yes, Asuka is much less self-reliant and independent in this fic, it might even be called character assassination, and I love Asuka the way she is as much as anyone).

But you seem to want to paint him as some type of grunting caveman dragging his woman off by the hair. When in truth, he's just very scared for her and is doing his best to be whatever she needs him to be. THAT's what I meant when I said that I hoped I would act the same. Do you have any idea how hard it would be, for a teenager especially, to offer (he never insisted) to accept responsibility for another man's child, not caring who the father was, just out of love?

I've gone on enough. Apologies for not noting the date that the thread was started. I withdraw my EVA road pizza death wish. However, I do believe that threads like this would be so discouraging for an author, when the point he was trying to make was taken so wrongly, that why would he want to finish it? To open himself up to more ridicule?

So, if you really want him to finish it, maybe try CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM and compassion. You say that you were going for humor, but it just came across as cruel, vindictive, and mean-spirited, which I really hoped was not the intent, and hoped that I would never find in the Eva community.

Blessed Be, everyone. It was not my intent to offend.